by Geli
Jim and Blair belong to PetFly, Paramount and SciFi. No copyright infringement is intended.
I'd like to thank my betareader to help me with this fun.
Blair dragged himself into the loft late that night. He had been at one of his monthly student meetings with a group of anthropologists who met to discuss the newest developments in field research. He hung his jacket on the rack and got himself a beer. Tired, he settled down on the couch. Jim had been watching a game. Curiously he stared at Blair over his beer and popcorn. The expression on Blair's face alone was enough to make him tired.
"So what was the topic today? The use of mud in rituals? Cannibalism as a form of self-expression?" Jim teased his friend.
"We had a discussion today about sexuality."
Jim smiled. It was Blair's favourite topic besides Sentinels. The younger man was quite obsessed with sex in all its variations. He could ramble for hours about the mating rituals of an obscure tribe from a country nobody ever heard of.
"Okay, professor tell me about it!"
"You really want to hear it?" Blair asked unbelieving.
Jim was pretty bored and Blair's rambling was sometimes fun. Not that he would ever admit this to anyone. He had to keep his though guy image.
"You can let me die stupid, Sandburg. Share something about your wisdom."
"Okay, but don't complain afterwards, and don't dare to fall asleep!"
"I would never." Jim swore.
Blair smirked at him and Jim grinned back. Blair took a deep breath; he was not sure how Jim would take this.
"We had realized that although we claim to be open-minded and are convinced that humans are bi, only very few of us has ever tried it the other way." Blair stared dramatically at Jim who became mildly interested. "None of us had actually tried to play in our own field."
Blair beat his chest. "Can you imagine that I have never even kissed a guy," He yelled.
Jim was startled at the outburst of emotions. He wondered were they were coming from.
"You have kissed me," He offered trying to calm his friend.
Blair huffed. "Not like friends. Like ...that! You know what I mean, with tongue and everything!"
Jim sighed. Sadly Blair hadn't kissed him with tongue and everything so far. The friendly kisses he had received from an enthusiastic Blair were his most cherished memories.
"Well, Chief, are you going to do something about it?"
"Not me. We. We are going to do something about it," Blair declared.
"We?" Jim squeaked.
Irrational hope flared up in Jim's chest. A sudden vision flashed through his mind of himself pinned against Blair's chest, that beautiful mouth devouring him.
"Our group. The semester is over and we decided we will meet after the break and share our new sexual experiences with our own gender."
Jim deflated. Blair shifted on the couch and gulped his beer. He was coming down slowly from the heated discussion with his friends. But Jim wasn't ready yet to give up.
"This is a university project?" Jim asked.
"Not officially, no. More a personal field study. Every vacation we try something new to broaden our horizons. We've done body art, death rituals, stuff like that, you know."
Jim knew. He remembered the death ritual part. Blair went to all kind of ethnic funerals and rambled about symbolism and death for weeks until Jim couldn't bear it anymore.
"So what are you planning to do?"
Jim was used to Blair's weird lifestyle and this certainly wasn't any more unexpected than anything else Blair had ever gotten into. The Sandburg zone was common ground now. Maybe he could push things a bit this time. At last Blair had warmed up to the idea of being with a guy for the first time.
"To find and date a guy." Blair shrugged as if this was obvious.
Blair turned and looked matter-of-factly at Jim, who tried hard to look available at the other end of the couch. But he could clearly see that Blair wasn't in the least interested. Not yet at least.
"Anyone special in mind?" Jim asked nonchalantly.
Maybe he could drop some hints. Something, say, the size of an A-bomb. Introduce himself as a possible choice for his friend. Blair preferred to be the hunter not the prey. Jim knew Blair shrank back from aggressive women.
"The gay-lesbian group from the university is planning a movie festival. I thought I'll help out. It's a good place to start to meet nice people."
"Hmm." Jim was glad that Blair didn't want to cruise the bars for starters. "Not bad, Chief. Nice students, a bit nerdy maybe. But you probably wouldn't want to start in the Blue Oyster, you know, the leather bar down the 5th."
Blair choked at his beer. The Blue Oyster? Where the really, tough leather boys hang out? They would have a little student like him for breakfast. Blair wouldn't want to go there even accompanied by a fully armed Jim. No doubt the "guys" there would just pluck him from behind Jim and drag him into a dark room. Blair shuddered. Then a thought occurred him and he gazed at his friend.
"You know what surprises me here a bit is your reaction," Blair said suspiciously.
"What?" Jim blinked.
What had he said? Nothing a former vice cop wouldn't know anyway.
"Or should I say the lack of a reaction? Are you okay? Your senses okay?"
Blair looked at Jim as if he were expecting him to break out in green spots or show signs of a terminal illness. Jim looked normal and obviously all limbs were still in their right place.
"No, I feel fine! Nothing is wrong with me." Jim tried his most innocent expression.
When he saw the look on Jim's face, Blair began to worry. Jim was anything but innocent.
Blair looked dubious. "See, I tell you I'm going to screw a guy and you stay all calm and get that weird expression on your face."
Jim tried to get the weird expression from his face.
"I've lived with you long enough that I've developed a sixth sense about when you are about to drop another bomb. And I think this is a big one."
Jim knew what he had said sounded cryptic and he himself didn't know what he meant by it. It didn't matter though since he had Blair side tracked. He had learned that trick from a master.
Confused, Blair waited. "Well?"
Blair wasn't side tracked enough. Jim tried another approach.
"I think you might be confused about who's doing the confessing here. You just spilled your guts about changing your sexual orientation," Jim said indignantly.
Blair became unsure and changed the topic. He didn't want to alienate Jim about this. Jim was obviously okay with it and he was kind of relieved. He was a bit nervous about the whole experiment and having Jim's support would mean a lot to him. In a way, he thought of his older friend as more experienced in some aspects of life. Jim had been in the army and had worked vice. He was a man of the world. He was sure Jim knew what to do about his biggest problem.
"Do you think I have any chance of attracting a guy?"
Jim rolled his eyes. The guy was clueless. Blair was beautiful and a lot of guys would kiss the pavement Blair walked on. He had heard so many remarks about Blair, some had even made him blush. His lush lips alone inspired men to rhapsodise about his charms.
"You'll need a stick to beat them off," Jim declared.
Blair blushed and snorted. "That is nice of you to say but you are my friend."
Blair had some insecurity about his attractiveness. It was the fault of a gay friend; he had as an undergrad, who ranted all the time about cocks. 'Love begins at 7 inches' was his motto. He always told Blair that with a small noodle you'd had no chance even with the face of an angel. To Blair's envy, the guy was hung like a horse. He tried to find the courage to tell Jim what his concerns were about. He had seen with his own eyes that Jim had no such problems. Jim was generously endowed and had no inhibitions about showing off his magnificent body.
Blair took a deep breath and looked deep into Jim's eyes. Jim held his breath expecting a serious, personal confession.
"I've often heard that the equipment counts most with men. That size is everything." Blair made a vague gesture with his hands. "What do you think?"
Jim frowned. Where did Blair just get up with this kind of shit?
"I can't say anything about your equipment, Chief. I've never seen it."
Blair worried his lips. He needed a second opinion and Jim was the only one available. Resolutely he stood up, opened his fly and dropped his pants. He shoved his shirt and T-shirt up and held it up with his chin pressed down. Jim stared open mouthed.
"It's awful? Isn't it?" Blair mumbled, embarrassed.
Jim still stared fixated at the pretty cock in the nest of dark curls. And zoned.
"Jim, Jim!"
From far away, a voice called him back. Blair shook him and Jim blinked and took a deep breath. Blair sat next to him, pants on and looked very worried. Too bad, he had really liked looking at Blair's dick. It was nice and he couldn't wait to see it in full bloom. Jim smiled dreamingly.
"You zoned on my dick!"
"I'm sorry!" Jim blushed furiously.
"That's okay. I caught you by surprise." Blair assured him. "What happened?"
Still confused, Jim blurted. "I'm attracted to you." He'd almost said 'attracted to your dick'.
Blair was shocked. Had he heard right? Jim - his Jim - was attracted to him? Well, if he was, it made sense that he came out now when Blair wanted to date a guy. Or did he just say that to make Blair stop looking for a date? Jim was the jealous type. It made no sense. Jim had never shown any interest in another guy. Jim must be pulling his leg, but Blair wasn't buying it.
Blair sat back. "Really? Man, oh, man. But you are straight."
"I never said that."
Since when was Jim into games?
"You're not?"
Jim shrugged.
"Are you or aren't you?" Blair asked a bit impatient.
He was a too tired for such late night revelations. Jim sat crumpled on the couch and Blair knew he couldn't go to bed now, even though he was exhausted. He needed to find out to was Jim was up to. He was sure neither of them would sleep if this wasn't cleared up.
"Something in between."
What a stupid answer, Blair thought.
"You said you are attracted to me. Is that true?"
Jim nodded. He had messed this up big time. Blair didn't believe him. Jim had always imagined declaring his love in some romantic setting. Now he was sitting in his oldest sweats and ratty T-shirt on his couch, smelling of stale beer and old socks.
"You are? Why didn't you ever tell me?"
Jim looked at the floor. How could Blair not understand?
"What for? You are straight. I'm no Brad Pitt. I'm 11 years older than you. It's not like I ever imagined I had a chance of luring you into my bed."
Blair frowned. "You are right, I wouldn't exactly place you into my top ten list of sexual attractiveness."
"Yeah," Jim said crushed. "And you always make fun of my bad luck with women. I expected that you would most likely laugh if I make a pass on you."
Blair rubbed Jim's shoulder. He felt somehow bad that Jim had a thing for him and felt he would laugh if he told him. Although, he would have laughed most likely. Just the thought of it made him crack up.
"You don't care about the size of dicks, do you?"
Blair asked to cheer Jim a bit up and get his thoughts in another direction. He thought Jim was hurting now after Blair's thoughtless reaction to Jim's insecurities.
"No, babe, and your dick is definitely the most beautiful I've ever seen."
"Thanks, man. But I think you are biased."
"I don't think so, Chief. You are the most beautiful man I know, inside out."
"Don't overdo it!" Blair warned.
Jim sighed. They were both pathetic.
"How about me now?" Jim tried.
"You?"
"You could date me. No unpleasant surprises. It'd be a lot safer."
Blair tried to see himself going out on a date with Jim. Jim would be a gentleman. Still, he couldn't see it. It was weird and unreal. He wouldn't know what to do with his friend. It might be much less embarrassing if he dated some stranger. If he didn't like it, no harm done and he'd never have to see the stranger again.
"I don't know, Jim. I'm not even sure I like guys. It would pretty unfair to you."
Jim closed his eyes in despair. Blair had turned down a harmless date. Scratching together his last bits of dignity he had left after this conversation, he looked square into Blair's eyes.
"If you are going to date other guys I don't want to hear about it. Okay?"
Blair nodded and sat back on the couch holding on his beer for support. At the moment things were going too fast for him. He studied his friend sitting slumped next to him. Sure he had not regarded Jim as sexy but he had never thought about his friend in that context. He was a good-looking man and probably a good lover if his girlfriends told the truth. And he loved him dearly. Maybe Jim's idea wasn't so stupid after all. He would be safe with Jim.
"Have you ever dated guys? I mean, you know... you know how to seduce a man?"
Jim turned to stare at Blair. Was there a flicker of interest in the young man's face? Maybe everything wasn't hopeless? Maybe he needed just more encouragement. Jim was a fighter after all.
"Chief, it isn't different from dating a girl. You just try to be nice."
Blair tried to see Jim being really nice to him.
"I think this would be weird. You being nice and charming and all on a date and the next day you will be your old grumpy self again."
Jim sighed again. Seducing Blair wasn't going to be easy. He'll probably laugh anyway.
"At night you'll whisper sweet nothings into my ear and throw rose petals over the bed and then you would growl at me to stay in the truck and make fun of me in front of Simon."
Blair was going to laugh, Jim was absolutely sure now.
In desperation Jim tried his last triumph card. "Think of all the tests you could do with me about my senses. Sexual responses of a sentinel?"
If he couldn't goad Blair with this, nothing would work. The glee in Blair's eyes told him he was on the right track. Blair had boundless curiosity about sentinel sex. It was a cheap trick, he knew if, but in love and war everything was allowed.
"Can I use my Dictaphone?"
Jim stiffened but gave up when he saw the disappointment in his friend's beautiful face.
"Okay, okay!"
They sat silently side by side on the couch. Jim was crazy with happiness and at the same time scared that he would ruin everything and scare Blair away. Blair pondered how he had managed to get a boyfriend that fast and what to do now with that big, strong male body next to him. He had no idea where to put his hands, not to mention the rest of him.
"What do you want to do now?" Jim asked.
Blair shrugged. Jim tilted his head and scrutinized him. Basically he wanted Blair naked, on his back, legs spread and himself on top. But that was probably a bit much to ask for on a first date.
"What do you want?" Blair gave the question back to Jim.
Jim looked over Blair's head. A sly sexy grin spread over his face. The possibilities were endless.
"Okay, I see," Blair murmured to himself.
Jim gazed down at his friend. Some days Blair looked smaller than on others. Today was one of them. He appeared small, vulnerable, and cute. Something in Jim's stance told Blair that he turned from the man of action into the prey. It made Blair always nervous when women became like this. Blair-hunters. But face to face with a 200 pound, muscular, ex-covert ops hunk, it took on a whole new meaning. He shrank into the cushions.
"I could show you, if you want?" Jim purred.
He leaned over Blair, his eyes smouldering. Blair had the surreal impression that Jim looked like a panther in that moment, powerful, strong, a predator that would always get what he wanted. He'd never seen Jim like this. Somewhere deep in his soul, a door opened he hadn't ever seen. He suddenly wanted Jim so much that it hurt. He wanted to surrender him, be possessed by him, taken, and ravished.
"Take me," His voice was hoarse.
Jim gulped. Blair's eyes were black and huge and completely naked. He stroked over his face and Blair sighed.
"Take me! Make me yours!"
Blair had always wanted Jim. He knew that now. It had been there all the time lurking behind his feelings of friendship, covered by the gentle teasing and the shy touches. Jim leaned forward and captured Blair's lips with his own.
Blair kissed him back hungrily shoving his wriggling tongue inside his mouth. It felt so good. Jim was looming over him, so strong and he was at his mercy. Yet he knew he had nothing to fear and it gave him a strange and powerful thrill that ran like a shock through his body.
"Are you sure?" Jim whispered.
"I want to give myself to you. I think I never wanted anything else, I just didn't know."
Overwhelmed by the admission, Jim kissed him hard and slowly opened Blair's shirt and shoved it down his back. He tucked the T-shirt over his head and Blair breathed deeply, his chest moving. Reverently he stroked over the dark hair, brushing over the erect nipples. Blair leaned back slowly on the couch, presenting himself to Jim, giving himself wholly to the older man. Jim opened Blair's pants and pulled them off along with his underwear and socks. Blair looked dreamingly at him and shoved one leg up the back of the couch. Jim felt a wave of dizziness when he saw Blair splayed like that in front of him. He looked so vulnerable and trusting.
"I need stuff," Jim told him and got off the couch with weak knees.
God help me and let me find lube and condoms, Jim thought desperately. He didn't want to abandon Blair on the couch. He never wanted to leave the couch ever again. His prayer was answered and he returned with lube and some condoms. Blair was fingering his cock a wanton look in his face.
"I'll promise to be gentle. You don't have to be afraid."
"I'm not scared, just do me. Please. I can't wait, want you inside me. Jim." Blair pleaded.
Why had he never seen how beautiful Jim was, how gentle? He loved him.
"I love you."
"I love you too, Chief. I did for a long time."
Jim slipped out of his clothes and joined Blair on the couch. He hesitated. He didn't want to spook his younger lover. Blair took his hand and guided it to his cock and beyond. Jim teased the small opening and Blair trembled. Jim got so hard from it he thought he was going to explode. He stroked over Blair's furry body. He wanted to taste it, every little inch he wanted to map, explore, and own. Blair moaned and writhed on the couch. Jim's hands burned like fire on his skin. Jim was so gentle it broke Blair's heart. The big, strong man was playful and sweet and Blair loved him even more.
Jim marvelled at Blair's soft skin, at his pliant body, which responded so strongly to his lightest touches as if Blair's senses were sentinel acute. Blair began to beg and Jim knew he couldn't tease Blair any longer or they would both come right there. He warmed a bit lube in his hands and slid a finger inside. Blair stiffened and Jim bent down to take Blair in his mouth. The young man jerked up at the sensation. Jim pushed his finger deep inside the hole and coated the opening thoroughly. Blair moaned and writhed under him, caught between the sensation in his ass and the wonderful warmth encircling his cock. Jim knew he couldn't hold it now any longer. Blair was loose enough. He rolled a condom over his erection and lubed himself generously. Then he knelt on the floor and brought Blair's legs around his waist to rest on the coffee table.
"You ready, buddy?" Jim asked gently.
"Ready to lift off," Blair whispered.
Jim took his hips in a tight grip and Blair placed his hands on Jim's shoulder. He was sitting up slightly determined to see all, to see Jim inside him. When Jim started to push inside there was some pain but if faded soon. What remained was the feeling of being full, connected, one.
"Oh, my god!" Blair breathed. "Do something!"
Jim gritted his teeth and gave him long slow pumps, rubbing over his prostate. Blair came off the couch clutching Jim in a death grip. He groaned and whimpered. He had had no idea how good this would feel. He searched Jim's eyes and saw there the love the older man had harboured for years for him. Why hadn't he seen it?
"I love you Blair," Jim whispered.
"I love you!" Blair moaned.
He was going to come but he didn't want to without Jim. He tugged at Jim and drew him closer. Jim obliged and kissed him deeply, hungrily. Blair came with a strangled shout, biting down on Jim's lip. Jim jerked and came to. He saw bright colors before his eyes and his senses went all over the map, but it felt good, fucking fantastic. Blair shouted Jim's name and shuddered against him. They held onto each other until Jim slumped heavily over Blair. With his last ounce of energy, Jim drew out and slid down to the floor. His head came to rest on Blair's sticky belly. What a wonderful place to be. Blair stroked his short hair.
When Jim had his breath back he tried to raise from the uncomfortable position on the floor, wedged between the couch and the coffee table. He had hurt his back on the table and his lip stung. Blair looked debauched on the couch and half asleep already. He was utterly beautiful. Jim sighed.
"How about a shower, sweet heart?" He murmured and kissed Blair.
"Can't walk anymore."
"I'll help you," Jim promised.
Jim got up and lifted Blair from the couch. Blair was boneless like a Beanie Baby. 'Beanie Blair' Jim thought amused. Mine! Another part of him exalted. He was greedy, he knew it.
"How about walking? You still know how to walk, don't you? Blair baby?"
"No, I don't need to walk anymore. I just lie in your bed and wait for you to come and make love to me. Legs are over rated."
Jim chuckled. "But you can use them to stand in the shower. Sex in the shower is a great thing. What do you say?"
"Shower now!"
Jim steered Blair to the shower and shoved him behind the curtain. He washed them both fast since Blair was beginning to fall asleep again leaning against the tiles. Oh, god, Jim thought, Blair was his to play with now. He dried them and led Blair upstairs. He placed Blair at his side and tucked them both in. Blair snuggled against him with a sigh.
"Promise me one thing," he murmured against Jim's chest, "Make love to me from now on as often as you can get it up!"
"Sure Romeo, sure." Jim grinned happily.
When Blair woke up the next day he felt dizzy and his ass hurt somehow. It wasn't his bed and it smelled like Jim's. He turned to look for his mate. Jim was snuggled at his side, a peaceful expression in his face. He'd never thought in all the years of his sentinel research he would fall in love with one. With a start he remembered that he hadn't paid any attention about Jim's senses when they had made love last night. He had been silly last night. Talking about never leaving Jim's bed. He had no idea how Jim might feel about such possessiveness. Did Jim even want them to be exclusive in a committed relationship?
Jim stirred and smiled sleepily at Blair. His short hair stood in weird angles from his head. The hard man looked adorable like a little boy. Blair fell in love all over again.
"How'd you feel?" Jim croaked.
"Sore, happy, silly, unsure."
Jim frowned. "Unsure?"
"Where do we go from here? I mean, how serious is this?"
"As serious as you want it. I'm not proud. I'll take whatever you're willing to give me."
Blair nudged him playfully. "You can have anything you want."
Jim scrutinized him, wondering if Blair was joking or serious.
"I want this to be a real relationship. I want to try it," Blair declared shyly.
Jim grinned broadly and winced when his lip protested. Blair noticed and kissed it to make it better. Strong arms came around him. Blair quickly decided a naked aroused Jim was a wonderful experience. Blair rubbed himself against the larger body. Jim moaned and rolled them over until Blair was on top of him.
"Take me again," Blair urged.
"No, man, you are sore. But we do something else. How about mutual.... you know 69?"
Blair made big eyes and an evil grin spread over his face. Immediately he dived under the covers to search for his prize. Jim positioned Blair to get close to that pretty dick he had zoned on yesterday. When Blair had latched his mouth around Jim's cock, the big man's world melted. He knew he would now die happily. His world wasn't perfect but it would be much closer with Blair at his side from now on.
End Being Bi? by Geli: tarismare@aoween.com
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