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Love or Something

Summary:

Nine months after Jim decides to have a baby, Jim has a baby.

Work Text:

Love or Something

by Roxanne

Author's website: http://www.angelfire.com/ga4/garett/senslash.htm

This is not a male pregnancy story.

This story is a sequel to: http://Family Man


LOVE OR SOMETHING
By Roxanne

A Sequel to Family Man

"I'm letting it go. I'm letting it go. Like hell, I'm letting it go."

Blair grinned at his mother's muttering and continued to paint the nursery. It was going to be a shade of green called acanthus because it was the only color that they had all agreed on. Naomi liked it because she found it to be both calming and inspiring and would lead the baby down the path to enlightenment. Blair had liked it because in Christian art, the acanthus symbolizes heaven. Jim thought it was pretty.

"If I don't get out of this fucking house, I'm going to go crazy!"

Things had been pretty much like that for the last 9 months. Naomi's normally politically correct vocabulary had taken a rather bizarre turn to the obscene and just kept getting worse the bigger she got. Blair knew his mother was going stir crazy and there was nothing she'd love more than to make her escape to the Lunar Magic retreat in Flagstaff, Arizona for their annual spirit walk. However, Naomi, just like he, was staying in Cascade for the benefit of one Jim Ellison - sentinel, cop and father-to-be. Naomi Sandburg, the mother of Jim's unborn child, was contractually bound to remain in Cascade until the birth of aforementioned baby. Blair Sandburg, however, was staying because he was madly in love with the big, goofy cop.

"Shit!" Naomi hissed as she tripped over the dog's water bowl. "I can't see a fucking thing over this goddamn, motherfucking stomach."

The sound of a paper towel rolling off its cardboard tube was followed by a mumbled "fucking dog", then a yell for help.

"Blair, can you help me?" Naomi wailed as the sobbing began - again.

Blair laid the paintbrush on the edge of the can, wiped his hands on his cutoffs and headed into the kitchen to rescue his mother from another of her mood swings. By the time he got the 15 feet into the kitchen, Naomi was plopped on the floor with both legs splayed out on either side of the dog bowl. Blair could see that she was sitting in most of the water, but still valiantly trying to wipe up what was left with the last paper towel. Tears streaked down her face and her lower lip quivered, giving her the unsettling look, of a pregnant six-year-old.

She raised a hand to her son, who used both to pull her up to her feet. Blair guided her into the living room and set her on the sofa, then moved the leather ottoman close enough that she could put her feet up.

"Oh, Blair," she sobbed. "Why did I do this? I'm 50 years old for god's sake? Was I nuts?"

Blair sat on the edge of the ottoman and regarded his mother a moment before answering.

"No, you're not nuts," he began gently. "You're wonderful. You're giving Jim and me something so ... important. I can't think of another person who would be so willing to do what you've done. I think that makes you the greatest person alive."

Blair had always had a penchant for knowing just what to say to butter up his mom, but this was from his heart. The only person he loved more than his mother was Jim and what his mother was doing to make Jim happy was an incredible gift. Blair had seen Jim's biological urges get the better of him more than once and when the time his buff body told him to reproduce, Jim had set out to do just that. He'd made some mistakes along the way, but in the end, the solution was exceedingly weird and amazingly perfect.

Once Naomi was sure that Blair was okay with the plan, the three of them had headed to the fertility specialist that they'd all agreed on. Blair's contribution to conception was helping Jim produce the sperm needed for insemination. The day of the appointment, Jim was the picture of stoic courage as he marched to the desk and gave his name and appointment time. The middle-aged nurse who checked him in joked with the two men as she led them down a stark hallway to a room marked "Private." She'd pointed out the TV/VCR combination, the stack of tapes and the pile of porn. Then, she handed Jim a plastic cup with a screw-on lid and with a wink, she'd told them to have fun.

Jim had freaked, practically hyperventilating over the stains on the furniture that only he could see, but Blair was prepared. He'd dressed especially for the occasion, wearing a pair of tight, threadbare jeans and the white silk shirt he'd picked up at the Goodwill. He knew what the feel of the silk did to Jim, especially when it was rubbed against Jim's sensitive inner arms. Blair could feel the bulge of Jim's erection nudge him in the ass as he shimmied against his lover's body, insinuating himself between Jim's arms. Then, taking one of Jim's hands in his, he guided it down to pop the button on his jeans. Jim took over and slipped one hand down the front of Blair's pants and began fondling the thick cock.

After few hungry kisses and some enthusiastic groping, Blair gave Jim the blow job of his life, then calmly collected the ejaculate in the plastic container marked "Ellison." Of course, that one got spilled when Jim had grabbed Blair as he was putting the cap on the cup and the two men were forced to jerk each other off for a second sample. It was a good two hours later when they finally emerged from the room and Blair handed the nurse the cup.

Naomi had been prepped for the insemination and was waiting in a nearby room. She'd obviously been there a while. She was sitting up in bed wearing a faded blue hospital gown and reading The Buddhist Path to Enlightenment when Jim and Blair entered the room. Naomi's smile was incandescent when she saw them.

"Oh, sweetheart," she called to Blair. "How did you boys do? Was it fun? Did you get a big enough sample?"

Blair laughed at the look of mortification on Jim's face and leaned in to kiss his mom on the forehead.

"Jim can tell you all about it," Blair grinned. "Hey, I'm going to leave you guys alone now."

Turning to Jim, he whispered, "You take care of her," then left the room.

Jim stayed in the small examining room while the insemination process took place, holding Naomi's hand as the catheter was inserted and keeping her occupied while she stayed lying flat afterwards. They hadn't said much about the process once it was done. Naomi had been uncomfortable for the remainder of the day, but by the next morning, she was up and meditating by sunrise.

They'd had to wait nearly three weeks to find out if the insemination was successful and when it was, they celebrated with sparkling grape juice and Wonderburgers. It had been a weird nine months for both Blair and his mother. With a wicked smile, he remembered the night Jim had told him of his plan to sire a child. What had begun with dismay had quickly progressed to a fight and ended with the two men becoming lovers.

In retrospect, it had been inevitable. Jim and Blair had developed a relationship that had exceeded the bounds of normal friendship over their four years together. They had initially laughed off comments about them being an old married couple, but in the back of his mind, Blair had known those comments were hitting pretty close to home. He instantly thought of the Christmas that he'd been at the academy. It was before Jim had set out on his goal to find a mother for his child and neither man was dating at all.

Jim and he had decorated the apartment together - nothing too frilly, just a tree, some candles and a wreath on the door. They'd spent Christmas Eve with Simon - arriving together bearing gifts and casseroles. And, then on Christmas day, they'd opened presents, before each retired to a couch to eat leftovers and watch football. That evening, after doing the dishes together, Blair had wandered over to the windows to watch the harbor lights. He could feel Jim come up and stand behind him, so he just leaned back - absolutely certain that this friend would be there to catch him. Jim's arms had wrapped around his waist in a movement so natural and instinctive that Blair didn't even realize it until he felt Jim's breath tickle the back of his neck.

Turning to spout off some silly joke, Blair was immediately captivated by the deepening blue of Jim's eyes. They seemed to speak to him in a way that words never had and he desperately wanted to respond to what he thought he saw there. Blair knew they were staring at each other far too long and he knew that all he'd have to do was tip his chin up a little and they'd be kissing. That realization bolted through him with an ugly jerk and he quickly stepped out of Jim's embrace, muttering something about getting up early the next morning.

The moment had been lost, but there were plenty of others where the two could have simply fallen into each other's arms with the least provocation. And once they had kissed, Blair had been lost in a passion that was all-consuming. It had taken only one kiss for him to know that everything he'd ever done in his life had led him to that moment when he became Jim's.

Blair's life had changed a lot in the 9 months of his mother's pregnancy. For one thing, he'd convinced Jim to quit the police force and start his own security company. With some financial backing from William and Stephen Ellison, Jim had created E & S Security. His first move as company president was to hire Blair as his partner. Jim had been doubtful about his ability to attract enough clients to make a go of his own business, but between Blair's gift of gab and Jim's special abilities, they'd carved out a nice little slice of the security business in Cascade.

The change in career had been an important consideration in Jim and Blair's discussions about raising their child. Jim was afraid that owning his own business would take too much of his time and he'd end up like his father. There was no way he wanted to become more involved in work than in his child's life. Blair had calmly listed the pros and cons of the new business idea and compared them to that of staying on with the police force. All that became a moot point when Blair got beat up by three homophobic uniforms while investigating a dead end lead on a string of carjackings.

Jim had written his letter of resignation that night after they had come home from filing a complaint. It seemed that while Simon was understanding about the whole Sentinel thing, he was less than supportive of the change in their relationship. As a matter of fact, he told the two men that if the subject of their relationship ever came up again, he would separate the two men and transfer Blair as far away from Major Crime as he could get.

Jim had been crushed by Simon's attitude and set up a meeting the very next morning with his father and brother. William and Stephen's reactions had been just the opposite. Blair guessed that they'd had their suspicions about Jim's sexuality all along and both were just so happy to have Jim back in their lives with Blair taking care of him, that they could handle most anything. While Blair lay at home recuperating from three broken ribs, the Ellisons worked up an agreement that would let Jim begin his new career immediately.

Jim turned in his resignation the next day, but Blair stayed on until the new security firm got established. Simon partnered him with Megan and treated him like a pariah, but Blair just kept smiling and counting the days until he could start working with Jim again. Suzanne Tomaki called Jim as soon as word got out that he'd left the police force. With her support, E&S Protection Services won a no-bid contract for testing the newest security system at Rainier's hazmat lab and the new company was in business.

It didn't take long for Jim and Blair to decide that the loft was no place to run a business or raise a baby. Blair still remembered the night he came home from work to find Jim already packing boxes. His first response had been terror that they were about to repeat the whole Alex Barnes episode. His heart jumping into his throat must have caught Jim's attention, because he was on his feet with his arms around his lover in record time.

"What's the matter, Blair?" Jim had asked in all innocence. "Did something happen at work?"

Blair had savored the warmth of Jim's embrace long enough to calm his breathing, then kissed Jim on the jaw.

"Jim," Blair said as calmly as possible. "What the fuck are you doing?"

Staring down at the look of shock on Blair's face, Jim answered, "Packing. Why are you so upset? Did Simon say something?"

"No, Simon didn't say anything," Blair insisted as he pushed off the solid chest. "Why are you packing? You're not having visions again are you?"

Jim caught a flailing hand and held it still while he tried to process the last question.

"What makes you think that I'm ... oh, my god. I'm so sorry, babe. I didn't think."

Blair pulled his hand free and began to pace around the living room.

"Don't do that, man, you could give a guy a heart attack."

Blair kicked at a box and then stomped over to get right in Jim's face.

"I thought we'd been through this," he said. "I thought we were going to communicate. You can't just start packing and expect me to know what's what."

Jim grabbed a flannel-covered bicep and pulled his partner to the couch.

"I'm sorry. I just thought I'd get started. We talked about moving. Why are you so hyped up?"

Clearly not getting through to Jim, Blair closed his eyes, counted to ten and started again.

"We talked about moving ... in the future. We never made any decisions. Or have you?"

Jim had the good sense then to look sheepish.

"You've bought a house, haven't you?"

Blair's voice kept raising pitch as he talked, so that by the end of the question, it was at a level that would make dogs howl.

"I haven't bought it ... yet."

"Yet?"

The pitch had come down, but the tone was no less incredulous.

"Remember Brent Martin's place? That log cabin in Cascade Woods?"

The log cabin had been a crime scene after Martin's wife had been murdered there. Martin had met a similar fate - dying by being thrown from an airborne helicopter.

"Yeah ... I remember."

"Well, it's finally through probate and the family just wants to get rid of it. They're only asking $850,000 for it."

"Is that all?"

Jim stiffened at the sarcasm in the response, but then plowed ahead.

"Yeah. That's for the house, the out buildings and four acres of lakefront property. Blair, that's a steal."

"A steal. And how do we afford house payments on this steal?"

The smile is what finally gave it away.

"You shit!" Blair shouted as he turned and pounced on his lover. "What's going on here and don't string this out any more. Just give me the facts, man."

Jim scooted around on the couch until their positions resembled cuddling more than confinement. Lying on his back, Jim kept one hand resting on Blair's ass while the other fingered the soft curls at the nape of his neck.

"Okay, Joe Friday. You wormed it out of me. I've already had an offer on the loft for $950,000. We'll have more than enough to buy the cabin out right and to do some remodeling before the baby gets here."

Blair rose up a bit and slapped his partner on the chest. "You jerk. Why didn't you tell me this before now?"

Jim could tell he was still irritated, so he gave Blair's ass a squeeze and took a moment to kiss the hard set of his jaw.

"I didn't want to jinx the deal or get your hopes up if everything fell apart. I know how you've wanted to get out of the city and when I heard about the Martin place, I couldn't pass it up."

Blair laid his head against Jim's chest in an act that may have looked like submission to the casual observer, but was anything but that in reality. Jim let Blair take the time he needed and braced himself for the flurry of questions that would follow.

"I don't remember a lot," Blair began eventually, "but did this place have indoor plumbing?"

Jim laughed so hard that Blair was almost bounced from his position on the couch.

"Of course it does. It's got two bathrooms and three bedrooms and a huge family room off the kitchen. There's no basement, but there's a two-car garage and two sheds that we can use for storage. There's also a screened in porch across that back that I think could be remodeled into an office."

"Man, I didn't think the place was that big," Blair said. "What about utilities? Last time we were there, we were out of cell range. Is that going to be a problem?"

Jim shook his head. "Not at all. They've built a tower closer and we can get a satellite for television and Internet service. There's a well for water, propane for heat and a septic tank for all those dirty diapers you're going to have to change."

"I'm going to have to change?"

Blair rose up again and this time the look on his face was positively wicked.

"As you'll recall, buster, this little baby is yours. I'm just the funny uncle and uncles don't do diaper duty. And what's more, us Sandburgs are known for our capacious bowels. You, my friend, are going to be knee-deep in baby shit in just a few short months."

Blair's cackle filled the room as he tried to pull away. Jim was having none of that and held on tight, pulling his partner back to him.

"Capacious bowels? So, that's why you're so full of shit, huh Sandberg?" he growled before pulling Blair in for a kiss.

"Yep," Blair managed to get out before being pulled back to Jim's lips.

The two men were still kissing when Naomi breezed in the door of the loft and tossed a shopping bag on an empty chair.

"You two! You never stop," she scolded before tossing her coat aside and heading for the kitchen. "Who's for some curried chickpea and potato soup? I found this new recipe on the Internet and I've been dying to try it. I picked up all the ingredients at GoVeg."

Naomi was wearing a purple hemp maternity dress that must have taken an entire bolt of fabric to construct. The top portion was cut simply, scooped around her neck with tight sleeves that covered her slender arms. From there down, the thing seemed to grow in width in direct relation to its length. The bottom of the dress swirled around Naomi's ankles in what looked like a tripping accident waiting to happen.

Giving his lover one last kiss, Blair hopped off Jim and the couch and grabbed the grocery sack that Naomi had abandoned on the chair. Jim lay still a while longer, waiting for his budding erection to wilt down to unnoticeable proportions.

"Can you skip the curry powder in this recipe," Blair asked while pulling a carton of tofu from the white cotton bag his mother always used for shopping. "You know how Jim reacts to the stuff."

Naomi shrugged then grabbed the tofu from Blair's hand.

"Okay. How about the barbequed tofu and potato kabobs? I don't think there's anything in there that he's allergic to."

Naomi made little quote motions with her hands, then began rummaging for pans.

"How about you have what you want and Blair and I will cook some hamburgers," Jim asked as he surveyed the contents of Naomi's shopping bag. "I think it's the tofu that's giving me such gas."

Blair swatted Jim on the arm, then gave him the 'better get out while the getting's good' gesture. Naomi was too fast for them though.

"Oh, I've been thinking about baby names again," she called from a crouching position in front of the refrigerator.

Jim and Blair stopped in their tracks and waited for the latest.

"Bixenta. It means victorious in Basque. Wouldn't that be a perfect name for a little girl?"

"Perfect," Jim said through gritted teeth. He'd already announced his preference for a girl's name ... Madeline, after his mother's mother.

"And what if it's a boy," Blair asked with just the faintest hint of amusement.

"Baingana. It's Ugandan for people are equal. Isn't that lovely?"

"Lovely," Jim repeated. This time his response was uttered in that low and menacing voice he usually reserved for serial killers and mothers-in-law.

"Come on, Jim," Blair urged. "Let's start sorting through my books ... upstairs and let Mom cook in peace."

Taking Jim's hand, Blair pulled the snarling Sentinel towards the steps and up to the relative privacy of the loft bedroom. Once there, Blair flopped on the bed, laughing.

"Oh man, if you could see your face. You are so easy. You know she searches for those names on the Internet just so she can get your goat with them?"

Jim stood hovering over his partner and wondered, not for the first time, what he'd gotten himself into by jumping in the Sandburg gene pool.

The three of them had moved into the house in Naomi's seventh month and been working on it since then. Blair had quit the PD as soon as the papers were signed and spent most of his time on home improvements and running interference between Jim and his mom. He'd found a puppy that had been dumped in the woods a week after the move and named it Seda which means forest voices in Armenian. It had been one of his mom's favorite names since it could be used for a boy or girl.

Seda had looked like a black lab puppy when he was found, but was beginning to show traits of being something much stranger. For one thing, Seda had this ridge of curly, poodle hair that ran the length of his spine. When he'd hear something outside or Jim would yell at Naomi, Seda would growl really low in his throat and the hair on his back would raise up and make him look like a razorback boar. Of course, if the noise turned out to be anybody with a hand to pet him, Seda would wiggle around if a fit of glee and then pee all over the intruder's feet. He was a good dog though and made good company on nights when Blair was left alone.

Truth was, he didn't really get many nights alone anymore. As Naomi's time grew closer, she stayed closer too. Yes, there was the binding contract that she and Jim had signed, but Blair knew there was also a bit of fear about the pregnancy that kept his mom nearby. On more than one occasion, she's muttered remarks about being too old for this and what would happen if something went wrong. Blair had assured her that they all knew the risks and that neither he nor Jim would hold it against her if something went wrong with the pregnancy.

But the time flew by and here she was, due in three weeks and big as a barn. Her tear-stained face was chubby, but glowing with the beauty of pregnancy. She'd really done remarkably well, Blair thought. There were times he'd wondered if the three of them would make it through the nine months alive, let alone speaking to each other.

"Blair, honey," Naomi interrupted his thoughts. "I think I've got a problem."

"Yeah, Mom?" Blair stood to get her whatever she was craving now.

"I think my water just broke."

Sure enough, the seat of Jim's favorite chair was dark and wet and the spot was getting bigger.

"Oh crap. Are you okay? Can you get up? Is your bag packed?"

Naomi struggled to hoist herself from the chair, then gratefully took Blair's hand. Once standing, she tugged the wet fabric of her maternity pants away from her bottom and made a face.

"Okay. First things first. You call Jim while I change clothes. He can meet us at Cascade General. After you get off the phone from him, call Dr. Coakes and tell her to meet us there. By then, I should be changed. The bag is packed and in the front closet so if I'm not done when you get off the phone, you can get it and then get the car ready. Don't forget to put Seda in his kennel. Who knows how long we'll be gone."

Not used to his mother being the model of efficiency, Blair stood and gaped after her.

"Get moving, Blair. I don't have all day," she called as she turned the corner into her bedroom.

Things got pretty hectic after that. Even though Naomi assured Blair ... and Jim by phone ... that she had plenty of time, Jim insisted on contacting the sheriff and getting an escort into town. He was pacing in front of the ER doors when Blair's new Honda Accord pulled up. Jim pushed a wheelchair up to the car, but Naomi rolled down a window and calmly told him to get in and they would all drive around to the main entrance. She was to go in through Admitting and the hospital was so huge that it was about a three-block walk away. Jim waved the sheriff's deputy away, then folded himself into the back seat.

Blair let Jim and his mom off at the door, then went in search of a parking space. By the time he got to Admitting, Naomi had been checked in and was waiting for the elevator to take her to the second floor. She was wheeled into a brand new birthing room that looked more like their living room than any hospital room either man had seen. There was the standard hospital bed, but the chairs in the room were overstuffed, upholstered chairs that looked like they were made for watching the game in. There was a 32-inch TV in an armoire and a rocking chair close to the bed.

Jim was unpacking Naomi's suitcase and Blair was getting his mom some water when Dr. Coakes breezed in. No more than 30 years old or five feet tall, Dr. Coakes was still a force to be reckoned with. She'd been fully apprised of the circumstances of this birth and even knew the possibility of this being a Sentinel baby. She'd been impressed, but unruffled about Jim's abilities and seemed to understand the problems that could occur if the baby had hyperactive senses at birth. That was one reason for the special birthing room. It was the quietest and least stressful room in the hospital.

"Okay, mommy," Coakes grinned. "You ready to get this show on the road?"

Naomi busted out in tears and Jim ran to her side to hold her through the latest episode. When Blair made a move toward his mother, Dr. Coakes grabbed his arm and held him back.

"Give them a minute," she whispered.

Blair watched with awe as Jim soothed his mother's tears and held her with such care and kindness that it made him ache. Any doubts he'd ever had about Jim's ability to raise a child disappeared in a heartbeat. Dr. Coakes, led him out into the hallway and pulled the door closed behind her. Wishing for Sentinel hearing, Blair stared through the small window in the door at his lover and mother. Jim must have been monitoring him because after a moment, he looked up into Blair's eyes and nodded. Disregarding the doctor's sigh of impatience, Blair opened the door and rushed back in to join in the hug.

Madeline Naomi Sandburg Ellison was born at 7:45 p.m. on Monday, July 9, 2001. Madeline was perfect with white blond hair and blue, blue eyes. She weighed a respectable 7 pounds, 3 ounces and was 21 inches long. Her daddy cried as she was laid in his arms for the first time as her Uncle Blair snapped pictures with the E & S Securities new digital camera. Mother Naomi began to hemorrhage shortly after the umbilical cord was cut and was rushed into ICU where she remained until the next morning. Mother and baby were released 3 days later.

Two weeks after that, Naomi kissed her son and daughter goodbye and caught a ride to Big Sur. She wasn't producing any milk and she and Jim were getting on each other's nerves about everything from the brand of formula they were buying to the lullaby Jim chose to sing when Maddy was fussy. When her old friend Art Simmons stopped by in his converted VW bus, Naomi had leapt at the chance to get away.

Blair had smiled brightly at his mother as she waved goodbye, then wrapped his arm around his lover and their baby and headed into the house to get on with their life together.


End

Love or Something by Roxanne: [email protected]
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