Lonely Hearts Club #2

"But Blair -" the frantic hands finally let go of the chestnut tresses. "-I wish you'd let me mousse it just a little. Now that it's longer --" The stylist looked into the bright blue eyes reflected at her. She finally dropped her hands. "Sweetheart--" her tone pleaded.

"Grace." Blair answered her, in the same tone. He picked up a brush and a towel. While the matronly stylist watched in horror, he roughly toweled his hair, undoing all her work. Then he brushed it into a ponytail and tied it with a black velvet ribbon. The tied bundle of curls draped his neck, just past his collar. He climbed out of the makeup chair and handed her the towel. "See? Piece of cake." He winked at her, then bussed her on the cheek before scooting past, grabbing a tuxedo jacket while he dodged other models and makeup artists. As he shrugged into it, another model hustled into the dressing room, pulling a cashmere sweater over his head and tossing it at the fashion designer's assistant. He was taller than Blair, blonde and tan. He flashed a quick grin at Sandburg.

"Watch yourself, Blair. They're animals out there tonight." The assistant was unbuttoning the blonde's shirt, another one draped over the pudgy shoulder, ready to don immediately. Grace was combing the blonde's hair, repairing the damage the sweater had done.

"Thanks, Dan." He tapped the blonde on his arm. "They're always animals." Then he left the dressing room, straightening the red silk and satin cummerbund at his waist. He could hear the cheers and whistles on the other side of the curtain as another model stalked down the runway. Showtime!

Todd watched as his favorite model ran on a treadmill, talked on the phone, courtesy of a headset phone and watched the news on CNN at the same time. The young man's body was soaked in sweat, the jogging shorts and tee shirt dark and dripping.

"Namoi, I'm in London. I can't get to LA by the weekend. I'm sorry. Enjoy the festival and I'll call you when I get back in the states. I love you, too." Blair pulled the headset off and tossed it at Todd. "You want something?"

Todd smiled. "Just wanted to pass on that Julio thought you were beautiful and his line of tuxes and dinner jackets have already been picked up by three of the major fashion houses in Europe. He says having your hair pulled back was inspired. Made you serious, with a threat of sex later. He sent you a bonus and a huge bouquet of lavender roses. I had them sent to your suite."

Blair nodded, but his eyes were on the TV. He grabbed the remote lying on the treadmill console and turned up the volume. He held up his hand for Todd's silence, his feet easing to a stop as he watched the newscast.

...."The Pentagon announced today that an Army Ranger missing for eighteen months in South America has been rescued. A team of Army Rangers disappeared in the jungles of Peru when their helicopter crashed during a classified mission. Today, the Army reported that one man was found alive, living in the jungle, with a local Indian tribe. The survivor, Captain James Ellison, shown here as he arrived at Langley AFB, is said to be in good physical condition after his ordeal."

Blair watched, mouth open as the man who filled his dreams for over a year was escorted off a helicopter. A close up showed a weary face, head covered with a bandanna, fatigue green tee shirt smeared with dirt and face paint.

"He's alive," Blair whispered, eyes on the weary figure as two green uniformed men escorted him to a HumVee. Blair whooped, bouncing off the treadmill and doing a little war dance. "Todd, he's alive! Jim's alive!" He grabbed his oh-so-serious manager, and swung him around. Other patrons of the exclusive gym looked at the long haired man as he bounced around, eyes rolling heavenward, or heads shaking disgustedly at the exuberant American.

Blair grabbed the phone again, put the headpiece back on as he punched in the agency's number. "Josie, need you to make some calls for me." He trotted around the room as he talked, one hand lifting a small dumb-bell while the other one held the receiver against his ear. "One, call CNN, find out how old the rescue footage of Captain Ellison is. Two, find out where he is, hospital, Pentagon, military base, whatever. Three, find out who is in charge and get me a name and phone number." He paused. "How soon do I need it? Yesterday. Yeah, fax the info over to my suite. Thanks."

He tossed the phone back to his manager, grabbed another weight. "He's alive, Todd."

Todd finally forced the young man to hold still, took the weights and placed them back on the rack. "Who are you talking about?"

"Jim. Jim Ellison." Blair's bright, open face was alive with happiness.

"And just who is Jim Ellison?"

"He's a guy I met a little over a year ago, well, eighteen months actually. We had a wonderful time and he promised me he'd call as soon as his tour in Peru ended. When the Army reported a chopper went down a few days after he left, I checked into it. The only information I could get was he was listed as a member of the crew and was declared MIA, presumed dead. I thought he was dead, Todd. But he's not." Blair bounced around the floor again, finally caught a glimpse of his reflection in a tall mirror. He'd filled out a little in a year and a half, let his hair grow and started working out, adding some definition to his lean muscles.

"Oh man, I need to shower. Then I've got to make reservations to get back to the states." He was talking a mile a minute to himself as he grabbed his gym bag.

"Blair, honey, slow down. You've got a show tonight, a commercial shoot tomorrow, and a talk show interview the next day. You can't just drop everything and run after a guy that probably doesn't remember you."

Blair stopped and looked at his manager. "You're right. They probably have to debrief him and check him out, make sure he's okay. And if he has any family, they'll want to see him first. What do you think? A week, ten days before I can see him?"

"Blai--"

"At least a week. Okay. I'm going to be on vacation, a week from Tuesday, okay? I don't have anything scheduled that far out, do I?"

"Blair, honey, you're getting all excited over this. Let Josie find out where he is before you start jetting off to see him."

Todd grabbed his model's arm as the young man tried to slip by. "Come on, be reasonable. He's military. What would he possible see in you?"

Blair looked at his manager's hand on his arm and frowned at the larger man. The model was very well aware how Todd felt about him, and how possessive the older man could be. It was something he mostly ignored. "He saw me, Todd. Not some model, not some rich, stuck up kid, just me. He's the only one to do that." Then Blair slipped away, dashing for the elevator which took him to the rooms he lived in whenever he was working in London.

It was almost 10 days before Blair was on his way back to the states. It'd taken that long to work through the red tape and actually find a live human being willing to say something besides 'no comment' and 'Captain Ellison is not available to anyone but his immediate family.'

He sat on the plane, hands caressing the news magazine cover, staring into the haunted, weary eyes that looked back at him. The article was full of words like 'courageous hero', 'unfailing dedication', 'honor'. In Blair's opinion, the article made Captain James Ellison out to be the model soldier, with no concerns except his duty. However, it said more in its silence. There was no mention of a joyful family happy to get a son or brother back. There was no mention of Ellison's future plans. There was no mention of a wife, lover, or companion.. Blair rocked his head back on the plush first class seat. To Blair, it sounded terribly lonely, just like modeling. Was dedicating your life to the military any different than living as an icon for an industry which chewed you up and spat you out when it was done with you?

"Mr. Sandburg, you really should try to sleep. The flight will pass much quicker." The flight attendant leaned over him, offering him a blanket and pillow. She saw the magazine in Blair's hands. "That's quite a story, isn't it? Imagine living like that for so long. No running water, no electricity, no phones, TV."

Blair only nodded, took the offered items. The pretty blonde turned off his reading light and Blair closed his eyes, one hand still splayed across the photo of the weary face.

Dawn crept across the plane and Blair's sleep was disturbed when the flight attendant rattled by with a coffee service. He stretched as far as the seats would allow, then accepted coffee. He glanced out the window, seeing the thin line of the approaching coast in the distance.

"How far out are we?"

"About an hour and a half, Mr. Sandburg." She smiled at him, not looking at all like someone who'd been up all night as the 757 cruised through the dark skies. Blair thanked her for the coffee and waited until she had passed him before standing up and retrieving his shaving kit. He had time to make himself presentable. He slipped his feet out of soft slippers and back into his loafers, before wiggling his way to the closet size bathroom and engaging the lock. He surveyed his face in the harsh white lights and shook his head.

The blue eyes which looked back at him from the mirror were bloodshot and worn. While he shaved, he let his thoughts drift back over the past eighteen months. Meeting the Army Ranger had crystallized several ideas floating around his brain.

He'd known for awhile he could not depend on modeling for longer than age 30. He just turned 26 and he could already see the hand writing on the wall, or more appropriately, on the runways. He was the oldest model Charisma Agency had on contract.

Somewhere in the next couple of years the agency would want him to slide more into management and public relations, using his name as a key to open a door. Blair stowed the razor, pulled out aftershave, toothbrush and face cream while he was thinking. Management? He didn't think so. Once he decided to pull the plug on this modeling gig, full time school beckoned. One thing modeling had given him was a solid bank balance and he could indulge himself his love for schools, and libraries. A laptop computer and the Internet had already let him enroll in classes part-time.

He washed his face, letting the steaming cloth open the pores, before rubbing in a moisturizer. Finished with face and teeth, he pulled out a wide brush and began to groom his shoulder length mane, before pulling it into a pony tail. He pulled on his glasses, looked at his reflection. Good, he probably wouldn't be recognized when he left the plane at International and picked up his rental for a quick drive to Walter Reed Hospital.

//Where Jim is waiting//, he told himself, //even if he hasn't called.// He went back to his seat, accepted a light breakfast as he went over all the reasons why Jim hadn't called. There were debriefings and physicals, getting reacquainted with his family, trying to find out what happened to his apartment or house, and other personal things while he was gone. The list could be endless.

Inside, Blair worried. He was sure there were a thousand reasons why Jim hadn't called. But the one he didn't want to look at too closely made his heart pound: Jim hadn't called because he wasn't interested. Suppose Jim didn't remember him? Suppose all he had were the memories and feelings of one night? When he thought Jim was dead, there was one type of pain; the pain of losing a lover. Now that he knew Jim was alive, there was pain, just a different type, the pain of not knowing.

The pilot came on, announcing their momentary landing. Blair looked out the window, seeing the runway over the wing as they banked around. But his mind was on the efforts he'd made on the anniversary of the night they'd spent together to confirm if Jim was alive or dead. He'd been in Cascade for an overnight.

He'd spent the entire evening dialing every Ellison in the phone book until he stumbled onto William Ellison. Carefully, he'd asked if he had a son in the Army by the name of James. He didn't even get to finish the statement before the elder Ellison yelled 'damn reporters. Isn't it bad enough he's dead, without you hounding me!' The phone had slammed in his ear. All Blair had been able to do was hold on to it while his heart banged against his ribs. More frantic calls only frustrated him further because the Army would not confirm Captain Ellison's death.

The plane touched down and rolled down the runway, smoothly sliding to a stop at the gate. Blair grabbed his bag and was almost the first one out of the plane. He tapped his foot at customs, barely smiling at the poor woman behind the counter, then strode through the terminal, legs moving as fast as possible without breaking into a full run. His rental was waiting at Avis; it only took minutes to sign the paperwork and grab the keys. Then he was out in the sunshine, dashing to the parking lot and unlocking the car. His heart was banging against the walls of his chest and something inside demanded that he hurry, hurry, hurry. The fast little red Chrysler convertible found the straightest path and he was heading out of the airport as fast as traffic would allow, a map spread out beside him on the passenger seat. He'd taken a moment at a stoplight to map out his course to Walter Reed Hospital, marking it in red to make sure he wouldn't get turned around.

He tried to relax as he piloted the car across the city but his mind wouldn't shut off as the car cruised through the changing lights. He kept telling himself, he had to be realistic. A one night stand was not much to base future hopes on.

Jim would have spent the time they were separated fighting for his life. Not remembering or daydreaming about a young man he'd shared one night with.

Blair shook his head at the dark thoughts. He had to believe Jim would remember him, that he had felt something during that one night. But the other side of his thoughts whispered, pleaded, screamed; suppose you're wrong? The two sides of his thoughts argued all the way to the entrance of Walter Reed Hospital.

The hulking Marine looked over his identification and letter of introduction as Blair tried to look around him, and not flinch at the size of the uniformed man who blocked his entrance. His heart was pounding again, as bad as it pounded on the worst walk down a modeling runway. He was so out of his environment here. The building was cold, functional cinder block, the walls painted pale green and gray, the floor black and white square tiles. There was no color, no joy, no hope in these sterile hallways. How could anyone be a patient here and expect to get better? He smelled alcohol, Lysol, and other disinfectants he couldn't name.

What was Jim doing here, anyway? All the information he'd gotten indicated Jim was in good health, physically and mentally. Were they keeping him locked away because of what he'd been through? Was he being held against his will? Blair's mind eye pictured a sterile white room with padded walls, a bunk bed and steel chair, an armed guard at the door. Jim paced back and forth like a caged cat, periodically banging on the door demanding his freedom. Blair shook his head, trying to chase the image away.

The soldier handed Blair back the papers, nodded and buzzed him into the forbidding corridor. Blair slipped through it, and the Marine stepped out of his guard post with a map in his hand. He handed it to the model, pointing out the route he needed to take to find the officer that held Jim Ellison's fate in his hands. Blair thanked him, offered his hand and almost had it crushed, but the smile was friendly.

Blair's footsteps echoed through the empty hall as he passed closed door after closed door. He finally turned a corner and stopped. The cinder block building opened up to a landscaped courtyard with a fountain. On the other side were small cottages, almost cabins or vacation homes. They were still painted the military colors and each was identical, but suddenly the impression of a prison fell away. Each cottage had a small yard and a tree, lawn furniture and mailbox at the end of the driveway. Blair realized he was looking at long term outpatient facilities, far enough away to give the illusion of privacy, close enough to the hospital to be convenient. His fear for the man he'd come to find eased a little.

His map led to another office, this one in the corner of the courtyard, separated from the hospital complex, with another guard, this one not quite as imposing. The soldier checked his authorization, nodded and motioned toward the door, eyes assessing the visitor and dismissing him as no threat to a superior officer.

Blair opened the outer door, stepped into a reception area. The uniformed woman in front of the computer smiled and Blair relaxed. Receptionists he was used to, they were pretty much the same world wide. He told her his name, explained he had an appointment and waited while she announced his presence over the intercom. Then she escorted him to an inner office and opened the door.

The man standing behind the desk was the picture of career Army. Uniform pressed and creased in all the right places, ribbons on his chest. Light eyes met Blair's with a cold, calculating stare. All of Blair's internal alarms went off and he once again braced himself for a confrontation. A previous conversation from England had convinced the model this Captain Oliver was more military than Jim but had netted Blair an appointment with him, and a promise of access to Captain Ellison.

"Colonel Oliver, I'm Blair Sandburg." He offered his hand and was pleased the military man shook it. At least he wasn't going to be snubbed. He knew from the way the cunning eyes swept over him the colonel was already sizing him up as someone who could be squashed like a bug.

"Mr. Sandburg. What is your relationship with Captain Ellison?"

The bluntness of the question startled the younger man. There was no politeness in this man's tone. This was someone who was used to getting his way without objections from anyone. The coldness in the colonel made Blair shiver inside.

"Captain Ellison is my friend. I was very happy to hear he'd survived the helicopter crash. His father told me he'd died and I didn't know otherwise until I heard on the news he'd been found." Never mind that Ellison Senior had blurted it out on the phone with no idea of who he was talking to. Let the colonel make any assumptions he wanted if it got him closer to Jim.

"Yes, I asked Captain Ellison about you and he confirmed he knew a Blair Sandburg. But he didn't elaborate on your friendship. Why is that?"

The hair on the back of Sandburg's neck stood up. Keep it friendly and non-confrontational, he told himself, while his warning bells screamed that this man was a threat to Jim. "I'm sure the captain has more on his mind then telling you stories of our friendship. Getting back to the states, reuniting with his family,--"

He was cut off in mid-sentence. "His family has not been here, Mr. Sandburg. Captain Ellison requested we not inform his father. He indicated he preferred to do that himself."

"What? Why?" The questions died as soon as Blair expressed them. "Why did it take so long for you to allow me to see him? The trauma of isolation in Peru had to have been bad enough, without the Army adding to it." Blair's tone grew more incredulous and angry the longer he spoke. A horrible thought voiced itself without conscious effort. "Is he under arrest because he survived and the rest of his team didn't? Are you thinking he had something to do with the crash?"

Colonel Oliver sat down in his executive chair behind his desk and watched Blair pace rapidly around the room. He let Blair pace a moment longer before offering a contrite smile to the model.

"Mr. Sandburg, Captain Ellison is free to come and go as he wishes.

A friendly face may be what he needs to help acclimatize him to modern society again. He is currently assigned to our BAQ and will remain there until he decides if he wishes to continue with his military career. If you want to see him, take the path to the left when you leave this office and circle around behind the houses facing the courtyard. You will find a six-plex facing the street. He is in number 6."

Blair hadn't heard anything after he got Jim's location. When the colonel came around and opened the door to his office, he barely remembered to mumble thank you and shake the strong hand. He blew through the receptionist's area with a smile and almost ran the guard over as he bolted out the door. Nothing mattered at this moment but finding apartment No. 6.

All the uncertainty rushed back to the forefront of his brain as he stood in front of the door, ready to knock. What if --? He took several deep breaths, let them out on a slow count of ten. He visualized a calm candle, holding the flame in his mind's eye until the flame burned straight. His hand was steady when it knocked on the green wood.

He heard rustling inside, a door chain being removed, the knob turning. Blair took another breath, let it out with a silent prayer and held himself still and straight.

The tall, thin body that yanked open the door held little resemblance to the Jim Ellison he remembered. The eyes were haunted and shadowed and there was a heavy beard shadow across the bottom of his face. His mouth was open as if he was going to confront his uninvited visitor, but no sound emerged when the shadowed eyes fell on Blair.

Neither man spoke, just letting their eyes get their fill. Jim was wearing fatigue pants and an olive green tank top. The pants sagged on the hipbones and his feet were bare.

"Blair --"

"Jim --"

They spoke simultaneously and then stopped just as suddenly. Jim reached for Blair, pulled him inside and slammed the door behind him with a foot. Then his arms were around the model and he was crushing Blair to his firm chest.

Blair wrapped his arms around Jim's back, returning the embrace as tightly as he could. His fingers could feel the ribs through the thin fabric. He smelled sweat on the tank top, felt the heat against the side of his face. Blair wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Jim hadn't forgotten him! Then Jim was pulling him away, looking into his eyes.

"How did you find me?" His voice almost broke. The smile brighten the pale face under the shadow beard and there was a hint of tears in his eyes.

"Started with CNN, worked my way down, across and sideways. Just took awhile."

Jim pulled him back into an embrace. "God, Chief, I didn't think I'd ever see you again." His hands were under Blair's ponytail, fingers rubbing up and down the back of the young man's neck. Blair sagged against the larger body again, eyes closed, soaking up the warmth of the touch.

"I thought you were dead, Jim. Your father said you were dead. I didn't want to believe it." He ran his hands up the firm back, feeling the skin underneath the cotton. "I came as soon as I could."

The large hands were holding him close. The voice rumbled in the chest under his face. "I wanted to call as soon as I got out of the hospital but all the lines are tapped and I didn't want to say anything to you with someone listening.". Jim kissed Blair's face when he turned it up to him, eyes, cheeks, then lips, and the two men absorbed each other's presence for a long minute until the need for air separated them.

Blair eased out of the embrace. He touched the shadowed face. "I'm sorry about your team, Jim. So sorry."

Jim seemed to pull into himself. "It's been over a year, Blair. I grieved for them a long time ago. But, thank you."

Ellison took the hand that was stroking his face, kissed the palm and then placed it back. Jim wrapped the other hand in his, then placed it against his heart, pulling Blair back against him, holding the younger man with an arm around his back. They stood that way for awhile, in complete silence, just feeling each other. Jim finally pulled away from the warm body and gazed at the smoky blue eyes.

"I'm really glad you decided to find me." He looked around the Spartan rooms. "I've had lots of people in and out, asking questions and going to debriefings, but none of them were a friend. I didn't realize how alone I was until you knocked."

Blair followed Jim's eyes as the soldier took in the utilitarian furniture, the pale green walls and the small refrigerator and stove tucked in the corner that pretended to be a kitchen, a tiny bedroom beyond. The rooms spoke of age and neglect, without any warmth. Blair idly wondered how someone who was used to the heat of the jungle was handling the cold of his current residence.

"Colonel Oliver said you could leave if you signed out. Will you come with me?" Blair wanted this man away from this cold and depressing place. No wonder Jim was having problems adjusting to being back. Nobody had made a move to make him welcome. Blair was going to change that right now.

"Where are we going?"

"Away from here. Do you have any clothes, a shaving kit, anything?"

Jim followed the whirlwind that was Blair as he dashed into the bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet, seeing only a solitary toothbrush, a razor, toothpaste and shaving cream, all military issue and plain. The bedroom closet contained several sets of fatigues, starchly hanging next to a dress uniform and a pair of combat boots but nothing else. The metal dresser contained two drawers with only the bare minimums of underwear. Blair shook his head. Hadn't anyone offered to help him acquire some civilian wear?

"Grab your boots and wallet, Jim. We're leaving." He'd already dismissed anything he'd found as something Jim would want to have with him.. Their first stop was a shopping mall and a men's shop.

Blair headed for the door and stopped to wait for Ellison. It took several minutes for the Ranger to pull on a fatigue shirt and boots, tuck his new wallet and id into a pocket. He grabbed the key to the small apartment and locked the door on his way out, as if there was anything to steal.

Blair was bouncing beside Jim as they walked across the courtyard. Jim turned his face toward the sky and stopped eyes closed. Blair touched him on the arm and the Ranger looked into the questioning face. "I suddenly realized the sun was shining and it was warm. Not as warm as the jungle, but still warmer than the apartment. I don't know why I hadn't thought of going outside." He smiled at his companion's happy expression, touched a ringlet of hair which had escaped the pony tail. "You've let your hair grow, and you've added some muscle. Looks good on you, Blair."

Blair looked down at himself. "You inspired me that night." He winked at Jim. "Had to do something to keep me busy while I waited for you. You, on the other hand, have lost weight. You need a good meal. What would you like? Italian, French, Mexican, American, Chinese? You name it and I'll find it."

They were cutting across the courtyard when Jim heard his name being called. He turned and automatically came to attention with a quick salute as Colonel Oliver intercepted them. Blair found himself standing slightly behind Jim without knowing how he got there. He slipped out of Jim's shadow and stood beside the solider, even a half step in front.

"Captain Ellison, at ease. I'm glad to see your friend found you. And that you're outside. May I ask where you're going?"

Blair spoke before Jim had the chance. "Off base, Colonel. Is that a problem?" He shot a quick look at Jim, saw pain in the pale blue eyes and shifted so he was standing in front of the captain.

"Just as long as he signs out, no. But he should be back before too late."

"I wasn't aware I was under any type of curfew, Colonel." Ellison's voice sounded strained.

Oliver held up his hand in a placating gesture. "You're not. But you haven't been back in the states very long. You might find the city - uncomfortable- after dark."

"He'll be with me, Colonel Oliver. And if Jim decides not to come back to the base for the night, that is his decision, correct?"

Oliver looked at the smaller man and Blair could feel himself being sized up. He was small in stature, but lean and fit and his eyes smoldered with an unspoken warning.

Captain Oliver saw the warning in the dark blue eyes and acknowledged it with a predatory smile of his own. "Technically, there is no reason for him to be here at all. If Captain Ellison decides to leave our hospitality and return to his previous duty station, all he has to do is say so."

"I have been considering my options, Colonel." Jim's eyes were looking at a point over the Colonel 's head.

"Good. Well, carry on, Captain. Don't let me interrupt your friend's visit."

Jim snapped to attention again and saluted, then waited for Colonel Oliver to disappear back into his office before relaxing.

Blair growled. "I don't like that man." His eyes followed the closing door.

Jim looked down at Sandburg. "Neither do I." He made no objections when Blair took his hand and led him around the building to visitor parking, not caring if eyes followed them or not.

The car was parked under the only shade in the lot and Blair vaulted over the driver's door after making sure Jim was comfortably seated in the passenger side. His mind was already running through possible destinations and activities for the afternoon, evening and night. They stopped at the guard post at the entrance to the base and Jim climbed out, taking a clipboard from the MP that stood just inside and dashing off his initials, before handing it back. The MP looked down at the name, checked a list on another clipboard.

Jim had already turned to go back to the car when his name was called.

"Captain Ellison, you didn't put in an approximate return time." The MP handed back the sheet.

"That's because he's not driving and doesn't know." Blair called from the car, frowning at the uniformed man. Jim glanced at Blair and smiled, then handed the clipboard back.

"Sorry, you heard the man. He's in charge tonight. I'm just the passenger." Jim hopped over the door and settled into the seat as Blair tossed off a jaunty salute and roared through the gate. As soon as Blair thought they were out of the military guard hearing range he glanced at Jim.

"You have a lot of patience to put up with that stuff. Coming back to it after being gone so long must have been a real culture shock."

Jim shrugged. He reached over, put his hand over Blair's on the gearshift. "The shock is tough. Frankly, I'm not sure what is real. Except for you. You are real, right? I'm not dreaming?"

Blair had to pull his eyes back to the street. His heart was going to pound out of his chest if he didn't get it under control. At the first light, he grabbed his map and looked at a tourist guide of surrounding DC and Georgetown. Jim didn't say anything as Blair flipped through the guide, checked the map and then glanced up as the light turned green. After a few car lengths, he changed lanes, then did it again.

"There's a mall not too far from here, called Wheaton Mall. I thought we'd hit that first, find you a new wardrobe, then something to eat. Is that okay? Or would you rather go to a park, stay outside, take a walk." Blair stopped, compressed his lips. "Sorry. I'm babbling. I'm just so happy to see you, to know you're alive, that you remember me." Blair stopped again, then offered an embarrassed grin. "Sorry."

Jim smiled at the young and nervous man. "Blair, you could recite the alphabet and I'd be happy. Just hearing your voice is incredible. I haven't heard English in a long time, except at the hospital." He looked at the city passing by the speeding car. "Seeing this is incredible, too. It's so different, so crowded, so rushed." He took a deep breath. "And smelly." Jim chuckled to himself on that comment.

"I can imagine." Blair stopped at another light. "And really noisy, too. How are you dealing with that? I would think you would have a tremendous headache."

Jim nodded. "For the first few days the noise gave me headaches. But I seem to be used to it by now." His eyes studied the driver beside of him. "In Peru, I was alone, but in a different way. Here, I'm really alone. I just didn't know that before."

"Jim," Blair whispered, eyes hot with unshed tears. He turned his hand over, grabbed the fingers holding his. The car rolled to a stop at a yellow light. He pulled the fingers to his lips, kissed them. "You're not alone, now." He wanted to say more, but fear held him back. Jim was probably too traumatized to hear anything about love, or what he had suffered through as he waited for Jim to return to him. He kissed the fingers again. "I missed you so much."

"Blair," Jim hesitated. "I don't remember a whole lot about things that happened right before the crash, and not a hell of a lot right after. I remember making love with you, but it's like a dream." The fingers that were wrapped around his squeezed. "I'm not sure how much of what I remember are memories, or just dreams, conjured up out of loneliness." He pulled the hand holding his to his lips, kissed the knuckles, licked across them. "Did I make any commitments to you, promises I need to know about?"

"Only the promise to call, when you returned. And you said you remembered that."

"Yes, I knew I was supposed to call you. Your face kept dancing in front of me all the time. I kept hearing you saying you would wait."

"And I did." Blair reclaimed the hand so he could steer into a turn pocket, then through a green arrow into a parking lot of a huge mall. It took awhile to find a parking space close to an entrance and the two men took a moment to put the top back up and lock the car securely.

Jim looked at the mall uncertainly, then back at the model. "I don't know about this. I hated these things before I went away."

"We'll just hit a clothing shop, then leave, okay? Then we'll find a quiet restaurant."

Jim looked at Blair again, then squared his shoulders and nodded his head. "Let's get it over with then."

Blair stopped at the automatic doors. "Jim, this is not a mission or a test. If you would rather, we can go to a hotel, and I can order a men's shop to bring up a selection of clothes and styles for you to try. It's quieter, more private."

"And more expensive. No thanks. I can deal with this." Then he firmly stepped through the open door. Blair followed, his hand on the soldier's back.

"Tell you what. You pick out a store, and leave the rest to me, okay? I deal with men's fashions everyday of the week."

Jim looked at his companion. "That's a scary thought. You'll have me looking like a peacock in no time. How about just some jeans and flannel shirts?"

"We can do that." Blair looked up and down the long mall, spotting a Hects at the end as the anchor store, a JC Penny's at the other. He mentally flipped a coin and pushed Jim toward Penny's. The mall was full of music and teenagers, parents pushing strollers and center island pavilions advertising everything and anything. Jim stopped a few times to stare at some kid cruising by on rollerblades, shaking his head. He glanced at Blair.

"Did I miss something while I was gone?"

"Probably lots." He pushed his reluctant companion into the men's department and stopped, looking around to get an idea of the layout of the store. A young man approached them, trying to look helpful but stopped at Blair's glare. Blair shook his head, then kept going deeper into the clothing aisle, looking at a neat display of casual clothes. A man in a nice sports jacket and tie, neatly trimmed short hair and mustache stepped away from a counter. Blair decided he was probably in his mid-thirties and would do very nicely.

"May I help you?" His accent was more northern than southern and he struck the professional model as someone who worked hard on not presenting a pushy persona.

Blair nodded. He held Jim close to him for a moment, an arm almost around the thin waist, but not quite, smiling at the big man. "My friend here needs a complete wardrobe. Jeans, shirts, shoes, underwear, the works. Keep it casual and comfortable, add one sports jacket and dress slack set with a nice shirt and tie." Blair met the salesman's eye. "I assume you work on commission?"

The man nodded, eyes smiling, but measuring Jim. He looked at Blair for just a second, letting him know that he knew who was in charge.

"Good." Blair turned to Jim. "Told you, this would not be a problem."

Jim cast a wary eye at Blair, then at the salesman. The gentleman nodded.

"I'm David. If you'll come this way." He waited for Jim to nod, then escorted him to a rack of pre-washed jeans and started asking for sizes. Jim glanced at Blair, who nodded and smiled, giving a 'it's going to be okay' smile.

As soon as Jim was escorted to a dressing room with an armload of jeans and shirts to try on, Blair glanced around for the other clerk that he'd ignored. He was behind a cash register, a notebook on the counter.

"Excuse me."

The clerk looked up, placed his pen down and tried to smile. He was younger than Blair. But his eyes were hard, and a tattoo peeped out from under the sleeve of his jacket.

"Can I help you?"

"Yes." Blair dug out his wallet, fished out a fifty. "I'm not familiar with this mall and I can't leave my friend to run around, looking for stores. Can you leave the store for a moment."

"For a customer that is usually not a problem." He took the money Blair forced on him.

"Good. I need you to find a pharmacy. And get the following things." Blair kept his voice low, listing out a small list of very personal things as well as razors, toothpaste and toothbrush, shaving cream and deodorant. The young man turned red faced, but nodded at each thing Blair listed off.

"Can you do that?" Blair looked the younger man in the eye. He looked at the name tag. "John, I'll be right here when you get back, helping my friend. Find a nice shaving kit in men's cosmetics, put everything in it and bring it to me. There's a $20.00 tip for you if you do this quickly and quietly. Got it?"

John nodded and was gone. Blair watched him disappear into the mall. If the kid scored everything Blair needed, good. If the kid didn't come back. $50.00 was a cheap reason to lose a job over. He went back to the men's dressing room and flopped down in a chair. "Jim, I'm out here," he called, not wanting to make Jim anymore uncomfortable than he was.

David stepped out of the dressing room, shoulders draped with slacks, carrying two sport jackets over his arm. He glanced at Blair.

"Your friend, he's the one they just found after he'd been lost in the jungle for so long, right?"

Blair nodded, getting to his feet, worried.

David nodded. "He's been through quite a bit. He picked out a couple pair of jeans and 3 shirts. He's trying on a sports jacket I think is superb but he'll probably think is too much." David hung up the sports jackets he was carrying as he talked. "I sent one of the assistants to find undergarments and bring back several different pairs of shoes, athletic and dress. I get the feeling all of this is making him very nervous."

"It is. He hasn't had time to acclimate to what has happened and he doesn't know what the future holds. The least I could do was get him out of fatigues and into something less noticeable." Blair followed David to the register, handed him a credit card and scanned the labels of the clothes lying there. Nothing cheap, but nothing expensive either. Just an assortment of everyday work clothes, of mid-quality and mid-price range. When Jim cleared his throat behind him, Blair turned and froze.

Jim was wearing Navy blue slacks, a pale blue shirt that matched his eyes completely and a tweed blue and brown sports jacket with leather elbow patches and collar. Blair grinned at the man who had suddenly gone from the model soldier to a picture in GQ, shadow beard and all. Jim looked uncomfortable at the grin, looking down at himself.

"That looks nice." Blair finally spoke. "How does it feel?"

Jim shrugged. "Like too many clothes. I haven't had on a sports jacket in --" he paused, thinking, "years." He ran his hands down the fabric, pulling down the sleeves.

Blair walked around him, brushing off a fluff of lint, touching the long back. "It's very flattering. You going to take it?"

"Chief, you're spending a lot of money here." Jim protested.

"What's money if you can't spend it? Besides, if I take you to where I shop, you would faint." He looked into the pale blue eyes. "Do you like it?"

Jim turned, looked at himself in the three-way mirror, met the dark blue eyes behind him, then nodded.

"Good. If you're done, keep it on. We'll go to dinner someplace where you can show it off."

"Blair." Jim started to protest, then stopped at Blair's raised hand. He smiled. "Okay, you win." He turned to David. "I'll wear this."

David nodded. "Very good, sir." He started cutting off the tags and placing them on the counter. A boy just out of his teens almost skidded to a stop at Jim's side, his arms laden with shoe boxes and packs of underwear. David rescued everything and urged Jim to sit down while he unboxed three different types of athletic shoes and two pair of dress shoes and boots.

Blair leaned against the wall, grinning at Jim as he tried on shoes, letting the salesman tie and untie his laces, walking across the carpet and out on the tile floor, then back again. He finally decided on a pair of Nike and a pair of short dress boots that zipped up the sides. He looked at Blair for approval.

Blair nodded. "Keep the shoes on and let them pack up the combat boots." He glanced at David and immediately the stock boy was in and out of the dressing room, carrying the highly shined military boots. David nodded his approval and placed the boots in the box. Then the salesman started scanning the impressive pile of clothes.

They were interrupted when John appeared, a leather men's shaving kit and long receipt in hand. He handed both to Blair, who scanned down the receipt, unzipped the shaving kit and fingered through the contents for a moment, then nodded.

Blair smiled, pulled out another $20. "Thanks a lot, John. Keep the change." John smiled and shook Blair's hand, sliding a business card into his palm with a wink. "If you ever need anything else, just let me know."

Jim watched the transaction, eyes following Blair, eyebrows on the rise. "What's that?"

"A shaving kit." Blair dropped it on the counter and David swept it into the bag with the underwear. A total was rang up and Blair signed the receipt without even looking. Jim looked over the smaller man's shoulder and groaned.

"And when do you expect me to pay you back?"

Blair grabbed one bag, handed Jim another. "I don't. These are your 'welcome home, so glad you're alive', gifts.

"Captain Ellison. We're glad you're home too." David offered his hand. "If you need anything, call me." He handed Jim his card. "I set up a file for you, with all your sizes. You can call any store in the US tell them what you need and, if it's in stock, it'll be delivered."

"And charged to me." Blair interrupted.

David nodded. "And charged to Mr. Sandburg."

Jim shook his head. "This is way too much, Blair."

"No it's not." Blair and David spoke together, then they grinned at each other. Blair continued. "It's the least I can do for an American hero."

Jim groaned. "I don't believe you said that."

"It's true." David confirmed. "It's been a honor and a privilege serving you sir."

Jim looked at both of them. "Let's get out of here before it gets any deeper," he growled, then started for the hallway.

"Doesn't handle compliments well, does he?" David's eyes followed the tall soldier.

Blair shook his head. "No." He shook David's hand. "He's been 'lost' too long."

"I'm sure you're the right man to find him again, Mr. Sandburg. You were quite the hit in Paris two weeks ago." David grinned.

Blair arched an eyebrow at the salesman. "Thank you." Then he hurried after Jim.

Jim stood at the entrance to the store, looking down the long hallway at the mass of people hustling about. Blair touched his arm, smiling.

"Anywhere you want to go while we're here?"

Jim shook his head. "No. Too crowded, too noisy." He glanced down at the young man looking up at him with shining eyes. "Dinner sounds good."

"Dinner it is." He looked up and down Jim's long form. "You look good enough to eat, man. I better get you out of here before you're seen by hordes of screaming, horny women and get kidnapped."

Jim laughed. He caught the happy grin on his companion's face and laughed long and loud, pulling an arm around the firm shoulder and walking toward the doors.

Roaring down the streets at speeds too fast for the traffic, Blair was looking for a good steakhouse. Someplace quiet, but with distinctively American cruisine. But between the crowds Washington was famous for and being unfamiliar with the area, he finally gave up. He handed Jim the tourist guide tucked in the door of the car. "Find us a hotel, Jim, with a good restaurant."

Blair headed west, squinting into the setting sun. Twilight was rapidly falling and the time change, the hours of travel and worry were beginning to catch up with him. He wanted several things besides dinner, and Jim was at the top of the list.

"Find a place in DC. Just about anyplace caters to diplomats. They'll have anything we might want."

Jim flipped through the guide, then glanced at Blair as he turned toward the center of Washington, DC "Anything that we go to in DC is going to be pricey, I mean, serious pricey."

"Jim, I'm a model. An over-priced, seriously in demand, model. Since you went to Peru, I've saved money, gone back to school and turned into a hermit, waiting for you to come back. Money is not a concern. If you quit the Army today and asked me to support you, I'd say no problem. Right now, I want to indulge you, seduce you and love you. And I want to do it on silk sheets and on plush carpets. I want to lay next to you on the floor of a beautiful room, with all the curtains open, watching the city at our feet, the stars over our heads." He reached over and took Jim's hand, placing it on his thigh, covering it with his, then draping both over the gearshift.

"So, should I play hard to get, or just wait to get pounced?"

"Jim, just be yourself. Whatever makes you comfortable and happy is what I want. A good meal, good company, pleasant surroundings. If that makes you happy, then I'm happy."

Jim was speechless. He looked at the man in profile for a moment, then turned on the radio, finding a classic rock and roll station. He smiled when he recognized a Santana tune.

"I really missed music. The tribe I lived with had drums and reed pipes, but nothing like what we're used to. You have no idea how often I wished to hear music out loud, instead of in my head."

Blair smiled. "Then I have to make sure there is music." He watched Jim's head sway to the Santana song. "I take Santana is a favorite?"

Jim nodded. "Truthfully, it could be anybody right now. Anything but rap and heavy metal. That's just noise."

They stopped at a light. The twilight had faded into evening and the street lights were coming on. Blair leaned over to look at the tourist guide in Jim's lap, stealing a kiss on the cheek as he did so. "So, what did you pick?"

Jim had to jerk his attention away from the fragrant curls that had escaped from the ponytail and danced in front of his nose. "What? Oh, this one sounds good." He read from the guidebook. "Washington Marriott; European style hotel, health club, indoor pool, whirlpool and saunas. Atrium Restaurant and Court Lounge. 9 stories, 418 rooms."

"What's the address?"

Jim read it off and pointed it out on the map, tracing the route to the street they needed. Blair got their bearings and hung a right on the red, rushing toward the center of DC.

Blair walked into the hotel holding Jim's hand for all to see. He'd tossed the keys of the car to a valet, told the bellhops which bags to grab from the car and walked away without looking back at the young man who hopped into the convertible. The lobby was glass and brass, rose and mauve carpeting, vases of exotic flowers and mirrors decorating the highly textured papered walls. Blair paused, spotted the receptionist counter and proceeded on. He felt Jim hesitate beside him and he paused, looking up.

"What's wrong, Jim?"

"This is just," he paused trying to put it in words. "So much, Blair. Two weeks ago I was sleeping on a grass mat in a hut with a dirt floor. There was no such thing as carpet, or lights, or refrigeration. You killed game for food, bathed in a stream." Jim gestured at the luxury in front of him. "This building would hold the entire tribe, on one floor, heck, in this lobby. You don't know what I'm feeling. I feel -" Jim stopped, eyes bleak and lost. His mouth opened and closed a few times, trying to voice what was inside.

"Jim, it's okay. You're just a little culture shocked. That's understandable, and completely normal. It'll be okay. I promise." He whispered to his soon-to-be lover. "Jim, I won't let anything happen to you."

Jim looked into the earnest blue eyes. "Chief, you have no idea how out of place I feel right now. I couldn't be more shocked if I'd landed on the moon."

"It'll be okay. Trust me." Blair looked at his companion and made a quick decision. He pulled Jim down into a velvet sofa, setting beside him for a moment, stroking one hand. "Wait for me, okay? I'll get us a nice room and then come back for you." He smiled, using the one guaranteed the center photo spread in the fashion magazines. "Just relax, let me take care of things."

Jim met the sparkling blue eyes, and finally nodded with a tiny movement. "I'm not used to having someone take care of me, Chief. It's almost as unsettling as this." His eyes took in his surroundings.

Blair leaned over, brushed his lips across the tense jaw muscle. "Relax," he whispered. "Lean back and think sexy thoughts. I'll be right back." He stood up, still holding Jim's hand. He looked at their joined fingers and with his eyes locked on the pale blue ones staring up at him, pulled his hand away. "I'll be right over there."

Blair turned away, heading for the reservation counter. A young blonde man was behind the desk, watching his approach, with a large grin.

"How may I be of assistance this evening?" He was already pulling up a room list on the computer, eyes darting between the computer screen and Blair.

Blair was used to eyes studying his body, the way he looked, the way he moved. He was used to people making assumptions about who he was, based on appearances. He dismissed the leering eyes.

"I need a very nice room, for my friend and I. We also need a meal delivered, and some extra services. But first, please call your bar and have them deliver a warmed cognac to the man sitting over there." Blair pointed at Jim.

The blonde punched a number on the phone and handed Blair the receiver. When the bar answered, Blair repeated his request, described Jim to the bartender and then handed the phone back.

"Bill it to the room, please." The model waited as the room was selected and chosen. Blair nodded at the room's amenities, laid a platinum card on the counter. The transaction was completed and Blair took the two card keys.

Blair turned on his heel in time to see a redheaded waitress bend down in front of Jim with his cognac on a tray. The waitress was displaying her wares for all to see and Jim looked away, embarrassed. He took the cognac as Blair approached, and started to reach inside his jacket for his wallet, when Blair waved her away. "It's taken care of." He sat down beside Jim, watching as Jim inhaled the heady fumes. "I hope you like cognac. It's good for settling your nerves."

Jim's eyes were closed. "I don't know if I have ever had one, but I remember the aroma." He sipped the warm liquid, letting the liquor spread fire through his mouth and down his throat. His eyes popped open at the sensation. "That has a kick to it."

Blair chuckled, then turned his attention to the valet and bellhop who were bringing the assortment of shopping bags and luggage from the car. Blair told them the room number then pulled Jim to his feet, following them to the elevator, his hand still wrapped in Jim's.

The door closed behind the bellhop and Blair threw the interior lock. Jim was already looking for the controls for the curtains and stood in front of the huge windows as the panoramic of Washington, DC spread out at his feet. Blair watched the taller man for a moment as he looked out the windows, sipping the cognac, occasionally inhaling the fragrance. Blair glanced around the room and smiled to himself as he kicked off his Italian loafers. The beige carpet was soft and cushiony to his sock feet as he joined Jim at the window.

"Hey, lover, I'm going to order us some dinner. You still want a steak?"

Jim turned to the younger man, wrapping his arms around Blair's waist and burying his face into the silk curls, then capturing the full mouth under his. They kissed and nibbled at each other until someone's stomach growled. The noise made them both laugh.

"Guess that's your answer. Make mine medium-rare."

Blair kissed Jim again before moving to a round table tucked in next to the entertainment center and picking up the hotel directory and restaurant selection. Room service was polite and well stocked. Dinner would be delivered in less than an hour. As Blair placed their orders, he watched Jim move around the rooms. The rooms contained a nice sitting area separated from the king size bed by a folding screen painted to look like a historic setting. The large bathroom was on the other side of the bed and Jim disappeared into it.

Blair clicked the phone, got the hotel operator and asked for one of the clothing shops. He then asked for two long bathrobes with matching slippers be delivered immediately. He heard water running in the tub. Jim came back out of the bath, pulling off his new jacket and shirt. He smiled at Blair.

"It occurs to me that you've been on the go for hours with flying and everything. Do we have time for a soak before dinner?" The Army ranger was unfastening his slacks, sliding them down long muscular legs, eyes on Blair the whole time. He was left standing in regulation white boxer shorts, too thin to be modest, and too large for the narrow hips holding them up.

Blair stared, swallowed, and stared again. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath. His dream of eighteen months was standing in front of him. Now what should he do?

Blair pulled his sweater over his head, tossed it in a corner. The tee shirt followed. One step brought him within touching distance. Two steps brought him close enough to feel the heat pouring off of Jim's almost nude body. His hand reached out, slid up Jim's arm, not quite touching, but feeling the thick hair on Jim's arm brushing against his palm. Jim didn't move away, but didn't do anything to encourage Blair's touch. His eyes closed and his mouth fell open, breath pulling hard into his nose and out of his mouth.

"Jim." Blair hesitated. Up until this moment, he hadn't thought any further than getting Jim alone, in his arms. He hadn't considered Jim's feelings up until they walked in the lobby and he really saw how Jim was seriously going through culture shock. He thought Jim had been dealing with everything fairly well, including the mall, until now. He'd spent so much time daydreaming about this reunion. Here it was, everything that he'd dreamed about. Was he taking unfair advantage of the man? All the insecurities he thought he'd overcome came roaring back. Suppose the morning after turned out to be another one night stand and they never saw each other again? His hand was still stroking the air above the corded arm.

"Blair, " Jim whispered, eyes closed, head dropped on his chest. "If you don't touch me, I'm liable to die here and now." He opened his eyes, pupils dilated. His tongue slicked across his lips, leaving them glossy.

Only then did Blair feel the evidence of Jim's desire brushing against his stomach through his pants. The thin cotton boxers were tinted and moisture was beginning to make the thin fabric transparent. Blair groaned, gripped the hard arm tightly and leaned in to kiss the larger man. Jim's mouth was hot, liquid fire under his lips and Blair devoured the tongue that so willingly slid into his mouth. His arms went around the bare, hard back and pulled him tight against his own furred chest.

Jim's arms were around Blair's waist, one hand in his hair, the other grasping an ass cheek. He was growling into the mouth locked into his, breathing hard through his nose.

Blair finally broke the kiss, breathing hard. He looked at the flushed face of his rediscovered lover, let one finger trace the jawbone. "Jim, lover. Missed you, dreamed of you."

But they were interrupted with a loud knock. Jim flinched at the noise, drawing away from the warm body molded to his.

"Ssshhh. It's okay. I just had something delivered from a shop." Blair kissed the warm lips again. "Be right back." He slipped from Jim's loosing arms and went to the door. Before he opened it, he turned back to see Jim disappear into the bath again.

Blair opened the door, accepted the folded and bagged robes and slippers, signed the bill and locked the door again, looking at the soft terry in his hands. He hadn't specified color, but one was blue like Jim's eyes and the other teal green. He shook them out on the bed. Matching slippers, with the larger size in blue. Must be a sign.

Jim came back out of the bathroom, drying his hands. "I turned off the water, figured we didn't have time for a soak with dinner coming. We can do it later." He watched as Blair shook out the blue robe and handed it to him.

Blair smiled. "Something to keep you warm." He then peeled out his pants and tossed them in the corner with his sweater, bundling himself into the teal robe, only momentarily flashing Jim with his maroon silk shorts. "Comfy?" he asked as Jim tied the robe and brushed his hand across the fabric.

"You're doing way to much here, Chief. I just hope I can make all of this worth it." Pain filled eyes met smoky blue ones and Blair came around the bed and wrapped his arms around Jim again, kissing him soundly.

"This isn't a bribe, this isn't a payment for services rendered. This is a token of how much you mean to me, of how relieved I am to find you again, of how happy you make me." Blair looked into the haunted eyes, then wrapped his hands around the strong biceps and shook the larger man gently. "If you don't want this, or aren't ready for this, all you have to do is say so. I won't push. We can have a nice dinner, watch a little TV and go to sleep, if that's what you want." He shook Jim's arms again, smiling. "I can be the perfect gentleman, Jim. Ask any of the people I've dated in the last year."

"Chief, have you been waiting for me, ever since that night?"

"Are you asking if I've been celibate the whole time you've been gone. Honestly, no. If you're asking if I waited for you, the answer is yes. I've dated a little, slept with one or two when I couldn't get out of it. But I waited for you."

"Chief, you shouldn't have. I almost didn't make it back."

Blair kissed Jim again, whispered in an ear. "Almost only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades."

"Are you always the optimist?" He held the smaller man to him.

"The glass is always half full from my point of view." Blair kissed the square chin as a knock announced room service. Blair's eyes brightened. "Food, let's eat."

He quickly let the servers in, and got out of their way as a table was prepared, covered trays settled and wine poured. By magic a centerpiece with candles appeared and the tapers were lit. The two men stepped aside, let Blair look over the arrangement, then quickly disappeared at their client's nod. Blair motioned Jim to a chair and held it for him.

The Ranger eyed the dinner in front of him, then eased into the cushioned chair. "Do you remember the last time we had dinner together?"

Blair settled beside Jim and started uncovering the trays. "Chinese, in Cascade. We had warm Sake."

"That was the last time I had a meal in a restaurant. It was the last time anyone waited on me, asked me if I was satisfied with the food or the service. I kept that memory with me, and pulled it out a lot of nights, trying to remember the smells and the tastes, especially when the hunting wasn't good and the women and children of the tribe got the largest portion of the game."

Blair listened to the hushed voice, aching inside for Jim, almost crying for what this man had gone through. He took the callused hand, brought the palm to his lips. "You're not there now. You're home, with me. If I could, I'd take those memories from you and replace them with pleasant ones."

Jim smiled and the pain in his eyes eased a little. "You're doing it. You're giving me new memories. New memories that I will always treasure." He reached across the space separating them, kissed the lush lips. "Thank you."

The meal was simple; steak, potatoes, a vegetable and chocolate cheese cake for desert. A red wine for the meal, coffee and brandy for afterward. The two men fed each other, sipped the wine and were mostly silent, enjoying each other's physical presence. Blair slid his chair as close as possible to Jim's, and kept one hand on Jim's thigh as much as he could, toes draped across an ankle. When the meal was finished, Blair took the empty trays and set them on the floor outside the door, then hung the Do Not Disturb sign on the knob before closing it and locking the inside lock. He came back to Jim, who was sitting in one of the loveseats, feet stretched out, a small sifter of brandy nestled on his stomach. His eyes were closed. Blair smiled at his companion. It looked like Jim was as tired as he was. He went into the bathroom, refilled the tub and added some oil from his shaving kit. Then he turned the lights low and went back to Jim.

"Jim, come on, let's take a bath, then we'll go to bed. You're tired, I'm tired. A bath will feel good."

"I'm not asleep." Jim mumbled, but didn't open his eyes.

"But you will be soon." He took the tipping glass, sat it on the table. "Come on babe. I'll wash your back." He grabbed a hand, pulled Jim to his feet and pushed him toward the bathroom, pulling the robe off as he did.

Jim didn't object when his boxers were stripped off his hips and tossed aside. A firm hand on his back guided him into the warm water and he settled with a sigh into the oversized tub. A moment later, Blair reappeared and joined him, easing into the other end, letting his feet tangle with the inside of Jim's thighs. Blair scooted down until he could rest his head on the edge and closed his eyes. The soft sound of classical music drifted into the bathroom.

Jim opened one eye and saw the younger man, eyes closed, seemingly content to let the heat relax him. He reached for an arm and tugged on Blair.

"Come here."

Blair's eyes opened and he sat up. "What?"

"Turn around, lean against me." He kept pulling on the arm until Blair complied and rested his back against Jim's chest, his butt settled firmly against Jim's crotch. Jim wrapped his arms around Blair and sighed. "Better."

"I hear that." Blair dropped his head against Jim's shoulder and closed his eyes. His hands wrapped around Jim's and he echoed Jim's sigh. His hands caressed the strong forearms, dipping his fingers into the warm, oil-filled water and stroking the tan muscles. As his body relaxed in the warmth, his eyes grew heavier and heavier until finally they drifted shut for good. The last thing he heard was Jim's quiet snores from above his head.

The cool water woke Blair from the unexpected nap and he startled awake, not sure where he was or who he was with. The body behind him didn't move when he sat up and turned.

Jim was still asleep, his head resting in the corner of the ceramic wall, mouth opened as he snored. Blair looked down at himself, seeing the large hands which still rested around him. The fingers were wrinkled from the water and Blair looked at his own hands. Prunes.

Blair's movements woke Jim and he jerked, hands coming up defensively before his eyes even opened. His legs trapped Blair's lower body and started squeezing.

"It's okay, it's okay. You're safe." Blair turned as best he could, blocking and capturing one hand as it swung at him. He stroked Jim's face and neck with the free hand, whispering, "You're safe." He caught the other hand before it connected with his face.

Jim's eyes opened and focused on Blair's face, then flashed around the room, before landing on Blair's face and staying. His fist relaxed and he gripped Blair's hand, placing it tight against his face. "Chief? Are you real?"

"As real as you are. The water is cold. Want to get up and we'll take a shower?" Blair got to his knees, then feet. He stepped over the tub wall, grabbed a towel, wrapping it around his hips to catch most of the cold water running down his body. Then he offered his hand for Jim to brace against as the soldier got to his feet, water running down the sculptured muscles, nonchalant at his nudity. The bathroom was so large it contained a separate glass shower compartment next to the large tub. Blair reached inside and turned on the faucets, adjusting the spray until the enclosure began to fill with steam. He tossed the towel he'd hurriedly tucked around his hips, pulled Jim in with him, standing under the warm spray and grinning as the taller man finished filling the small room.

Jim gathered Blair close, lowering his head to kiss the man, sliding his hands down the firm back and gripping the asscheeks possessively. Blair's skin was slick from the bath oil and Jim stroked the body from cheek to shoulder several times until most of the oil was gone. He pulled away, looking into Blair's flushed face.

"I didn't mean to fall asleep on you, love. But the water was warm, and the next thing I knew, I was gone." He kissed Blair's nose.

"Don't feel bad, Jim. I did too. Guess we both needed a nap. How to you feel now?"

"Better." He snagged the small bottle of shampoo courteous of the hotel and poured it into his hands. "Can I wash your hair?" He ran his soap covered hands over the chestnut curls and started kneading Blair's scalp.

Blair dropped his forehead to Jim's chest and stood still, arms loosely around Jim's waist and sighed.. "If you decide to give up the Army, I know a modeling agency that would love to have you."

Jim chuckled. "Nah, I only do this for my lover." He washed the dark curls, leaned Blair into the spray and rinsed them, careful to shield Blair's eyes from soap and water.

Blair took the soap. "Bend down. My turn."

"I don't have much to wash. Even in the jungle, I kept it as short as I could." But he bent his head and let Blair rub the shampoo into the buzz cut, purring as the long fingers massaged his scalp and ran up and down his neck.

Blair smiled as Jim groaned and moaned at his touch. Bolder, he slid his soap covered hands down the hard chest and across the erect nipples. He palmed the nipples, feeling them grow tighter against his skin.

Jim's hands were on his ass, pulling him tight to his groin where Jim's growing erection prodded his stomach. Blair felt his body react to the hardness and suddenly his own erection dueled with Jim's standing firmly against the other man's. He turned them so Jim was under the water and the shampoo rinsed away. His hands stayed busy, stroking the slick skin, teasing and caressing. Jim groaned and caught the busy hands.

"If you keep that up, I won't be good for anything else. It's been much too long."

Blair turned off the water, pushed open the glass door and reached for towels. He handed one to his lover and wrapped one around his hair before stepping out.

Blair could feel eyes on him as he disappeared into the bedroom, and he deliberately twitched his ass as he walked, hands rubbing the wet hair. Blair dug through his overnight bag, digging out a comb and brush, grabbing shaving gear for Jim. The smaller man returned, placed razor and shaving cream on the sink, and started combing out the dark curls, watching Jim in the mirror as he did so.

Jim met the reflection's eyes. "You're staring."

Blair grinned. "Sorry. It's just I've dreamed of you for eighteen months and here you are and I'm suddenly scared to death." Blair shook his head with a shy smile. "My imagination didn't keep up with reality."

Jim tucked the towel around his waist, used another towel to wipe the steam off the mirror then picked up the can of shaving cream. "I'm flattered. But I'm underweight and haven't seen a gym in a long time. I've got scars from the crash, and -"

Blair turned, two fingers coming up to stop Jim from going any further. "Jim, you're alive, and you're with me. That's the important thing. Now shut up and kiss me."

Jim complied with the request, then started shaving, eyes watching Blair as the young man brushed and dried the chestnut locks. He finished shaving almost at the same time Blair tossed his brush toward the bed and turned back to his new lover.

Jim didn't hesitate in sweeping the younger man into his arms and drawing him into a kiss. Blair's arms were around his back, hands busily unknotting the towel, drawing it away and tossing it to the floor. Jim pulled Blair tighter, almost lifting him off the floor.

Jim bit an ear, licked down the long neck. "Let me take you to bed, Chief," he whispered. "I need you to make love to me." He sucked lightly on the leaping Adam's apple, leaving a strawberry mark behind.

Blair's heart leaped as his tongue was sucked from his mouth. A large hand was sliding down his body, finding his leaking cock and stroking it with a single finger. He moaned into the mouth which covered his, finally pulling away to breathe. His eyes looked into Jim's glazed ones, seeing the desire and lust there. His fingers were sliding up and down the long backbone, dipping into the crevice at the end.

"Yes, Jim, please. I've dreamed of you."

Jim dipped down, took Blair under the knees and lifted him, carrying him to the bed and lightly laying him down. He draped himself beside the small body, head propped on his hand. "You dreamed of me?"

Blair caressed a long arm, fingers teasing the hair on the forearm. "There were so many nights when you kept me company. I dreamed of you in the jungle, while I was in London, in Paris." He reached up, kissed the luscious lips above him. "And here you are."

He pulled Jim down on top of him, locked his lips to Jim's and devoured the Ranger's mouth. Jim's mouth was hot, wet and slick under his and their tongues dueled back and forth until they ran out of air. His hands were everywhere, stroking, pinching, and rubbing. Jim's flesh was warm and slick , muscles rigid under the silk skin.

He lost his grip when Jim rolled them over, putting Blair on his chest, one hand wrapped in Blair's hair, the other one stroking an ass cheek. Blair growled at the motion, then latched onto the vein in Jim's neck, sucking and marking the pulse point. His erection was trapped next to Jim's and he rocked against the firm stomach, leaking all over the flesh under him, sliding in the moisture. Jim matched the rocking motion, arching up against Blair, whispering love words into the curls.

"Chief, ...Blair...saw you in my dreams...didn't know ...longest time. Missed you." Jim's eyes were wide open as he watched his young lover's face. Blair was smiling, eyes shut, whispering Jim's name over and over again as they rocked together.

Blair opened his eyes, met the pale blue ones gazing up at him and leaned forward to kiss the chiseled face again. He braced himself against a hard bicep with one hand, the other on the planed chest, fingers rubbing a nipple to a hard point. Jim groaned into his mouth, panting. Blair caught the agile tongue, sucked on it. The pace increased and Jim slid a hand between them, capturing both cocks in his grasp and holding them together, pumping in counterpoint to their thrusts.

Blair broke the kiss, crying out, arching into Jim's touch as he came. His release covered Jim's hand, triggering the Ranger's and he shouted at the intensity as the orgasm rolled through him. Blair sagged over him, arms and legs draping on either side of Jim's body as he collapsed in the aftermath. Jim wrapped his arms around the smaller body, held him tightly as his breathing evened out.

Blair listened to the heart beat under his ear as it slowed down. He finally lifted his head and looked into the blue eyes smiling at him. He scooted up the sweat soaked chest and kissed the passion swollen lips.

"It's been awhile, babe. I was waiting for you."

Jim ran his hands through the matted curls. "It's been awhile for me, too. In the jungle--" he paused, eyes growing distant for a moment. "You couldn't let your guard down enough to enjoy a stolen moment. Because they were all stolen. There was nobody there that --" his voice dragged to a stop and the distant gaze came back to meet the smoky blue eyes. "I'm glad you waited, Blair." He rolled them so they were on their sides, facing each other. He reached for a sheet, wiped the evidence of their love making off their bodies, then drew them tight together again, one leg wrapping over Blair's hips. "I didn't know how lonely-" He stopped, lips compressing in a thin line, and turned his face away.

Blair stroked the firm chin, turned it back to face him. "Tell me, please." He kissed the closed eyes. "You're safe with me. Anything you say won't go any further." His hands slid through the bristly short hair, down the corded neck.

Jim shuddered against the firm body, hands locking onto Blair's hands. He kept his eyes turned away as he confessed to being lonely and scared since his return to the states, how knowing his father didn't even try to see him made him feel. Blair had to listen intently to catch the whispered words, reading the agony underneath which the soldier refused to let anyone see. Jim's words painted a picture of pain, fear, and near starvation before being found by an Indian tribe. The Ranger's voice broke as he told of burying the members of his team, saying good-bye to seven good friends, then turning to the tribe which rescued him and trying to teach them why he had fallen from the sky.

When Jim fell silent, Blair kissed him again, trying to put every bit of assurance into the touch that he could. "For whatever it's worth, you're not alone anymore. No matter what happens in the future, I'll be in your corner." He stroked the lean face again and again, trying to let his fingertips express his feelings.

The stereo was still playing and a rendition of Air Supply's 'Lost in Love' started. Jim turned his head, listening. He looked back at Blair. Blair listened, then began humming the tune that muzak was destroying. Jim started grinning, then chuckling, finally erupting into a full blown laugh.

"Finally, something I didn't miss. Rock and roll, muzak version!"

Blair laughed with him, happy to see the older man happy. He snuggled into the strong arms. "You feel so good. Think I'll sleep right here for awhile."

Jim cuddled his companion closer. "You're always welcome, Chief. Thank you for welcoming me home."

"So glad you're back, alive and safe, with me." Blair's voice drifted off as his body relaxed into the first real sleep he'd had in days. Jim lay with the model in his arms, until he closed his eyes and slept.

Blair woke hours later, wrapped in a pair of warm arms which were trembling as the body attached to them shook in the throes of a nightmare. It took several minutes to turn over and face the man holding him. Trapped in sweat-soaked sleep, Jim's face was rigid with pain, teeth clinched, lips pulled back in a grimace. It was several more minutes before Blair wiggled himself free and dashed to the bathroom, grabbing a face towel and soaking it in warm water. He crawled back on the bed, whispering the Ranger's name, taking the warm cloth to the clinched hands, trying to relax the fingers before the fingernails brought blood.

"Jim, come on love. You're having a nightmare. You're safe now." He kept whispering, taking long swipes down the arms and over the unbending hands. Jim's sleep acted more like a seizure, then restful unconsciousness.

Jim was talking, mumbling something Blair didn't understand. It sounded like a language, just one he'd never heard. He briefly wondered if the Indians Jim had lived with had a language of their own. He darted away to warm the cloth, returning and gently bathing Jim's face. The clinched jaw seemed to be easing, but Blair didn't know if it was because he was mumbling, or if the heat from the warm cloth was penetrating.

"Come on Jim. You're having a nightmare. Listen to my voice, feel the warmth on your face. You're safe. Wake up, lover." Blair whispered into an ear, ran his tongue over a cheek warmed by the cloth, his hands taking the cloth further down, across the straining neck muscles and over the shoulders. Little by little he felt the ranger relax, the muscles unknot. The voice finally silenced and Jim turned onto his back, hands open. Blair shook his head at the small half moons of blood in the palms. He wiped off the seeping blood, then wadded up the towel and tossed it toward the bathroom. Then he grabbed the shaving kit and dug through the case, finding a small tube of antiseptic salve. He squeezed a drop on his finger and rubbed each small wound.

Blair curled around Jim again, whispering his name, as he licked and kissed an ear. After several long minutes, the dark lashes moved, then blinked. Blair raised up on one arm, looked down into the puzzled blue eyes.

"Hi. You okay?" He kissed the soft lips again.

Jim looked around himself, then back at the concerned eyes. "Blair. What happened?" He shook his head as the model explained. "You took a big risk trying to wake me. I could have hurt you before I woke up." He lifted up to his elbows and Blair slid a pillow under the elevated shoulders and neck.

"No you wouldn't." Blair smiled. "You knew I wasn't a threat."

"Must have been some dream."

Blair nodded. "Nightmare, by the looks of it. Do you remember anything?"

Jim shook his head, sat all the way up, hands pressing against his eyes. "I never remember them. Did I say anything?"

"Not anything I could understand." He scooted off the bed, dialing up a light over the bar as he reached into the small refrigerator. Sorting through the assorted liquor bottles, he found a cognac and scooped up a tumbler before returning to bed. He opened the tiny bottle and dumped the contents into the glass before pressing it into Jim's hands. "Drink this."

Jim looked at his companion, then down at the drink. "Is this a common solution with you?"

Blair froze. He looked at Jim, a thousand thoughts flying through his head, none of them good. He shook his head, whispering. "Ah no Jim. But it will help settle your nerves a bit. Nightmares can have all types of side effects. You don't have to drink it. I can call room service, and have them send up some hot chocolate instead, or warm milk?" His eyes were huge in his face as he tried to read Jim's expression. Had he hit a nerve with offering the alcohol to soothe the trembling man? In reality, he didn't know this man all that well. There were so many traps when entering a new relationship with someone. Had he stepped on an emotional landmine?

Jim handed back the drink untouched. His gaze followed the nude man as Blair trotted the glass back to the bar and picked up the phone.

Blair looked at his lover still sitting in the rumbled covers, and smiled. "Hot chocolate or warm milk? Or maybe some soup?"

Jim looked at the young man in surprise. "You'd do that for me?" He climbed over the bed, reaching for his robe on the floor as his legs cleared the covers. He grabbed the other man's robe from the floor and took it to him, draping it across Blair's shoulders.

"Jim, love, you deserve everything I can do for you." Blair kissed the ranger, snuggled into the soft robe. "So, what can I do for you?"

Jim wrapped his arms around the model, kissed the top of the curly head. "Come back to bed with me."

Blair hung up the phone and took Jim's hand, kissed the palm. "Easily done." He pulled Jim back onto the big bed, then looked at the open curtains. "Let's move the blankets and pillows to the floor. The city lights are beautiful."

The two men dumped the bedding on the carpet, then made themselves comfortable in front of the floor length glass. Blair went back to the table containing the shaving kit and dumped it, searching through it for several things and tucking them into the pockets of his robe. Then he crawled into the nest of covers and draped the robe across his feet. He snuggled next to Jim. Jim was looking at the lights, head propped on his crossed arms.

"Penny for your thoughts, lover." Blair stroked one arm, moving one finger down to an armpit and tickled the hair there.

"The differences two weeks make. I'm lying here, in a warm room, in a huge city, with a wonderful companion. Two weeks ago, I was in the jungle, guarding a pass through a mountain, living off the land. Two weeks ago I was dressed in what was left of a uniform. Two weeks ago, I had given up hope of ever getting out of the jungle." Jim turned on his side, caught the hand trying to tickle him. He kissed Blair gently, then leaned over him, kissing him harder. "Where were you, two weeks ago?"

Blair caught his breath after Jim let his lips free. "In London. On a treadmill, watching CNN. Then I was here. Everything in between is a blur."

Jim rolled onto his back, pulled Blair on top of him. He ran his hands into the chestnut curls and inhaled as he kissed the plush lips, stealing Blair's air. The two men kissed, nipping lips and tongues, each kiss harder than the last, each nip longer, beginning to leave marks on necks and cheeks.

"You feel so good." Blair whispered as he licked the strong neck, then slid down the hard chest, bathing the ranger with his tongue. "Want to love you. Want you to love me." His tongue found a ridge of muscles under the ribs, and started following the well defined muscles until he found the dimple hiding a belly button. While he licked the belly button and pushed further down, his hands were stroking Jim's cock, awakening the man's arousal. He felt the cock harden, lengthen, until it stood rigid, begging to be touched. Jim gasped and whimpered under Sandburg's exploring hands and tongue.

Jim mewled again, his hands in Blair's hair, trying not to pull, forcing himself not to guide the warm wet mouth licking his inner thighs. He willingly let his legs be spread further and he cried out when Blair's tongue stroked over his balls, teasing the sparse hair on the sensitive skin.

Blair smiled to himself as his tongue slipped over the soft flesh. Jim's soft sounds of passion were urging him to more daring motions. He stuck a finger in his mouth, then used the wet digit as a gentle probe between Jim's cheeks. When Jim didn't flinch away, he repeated the caress, circling the tight puckered opening again and again. Jim pressed against the wetness, forcing Blair's fingerpad slightly inside. Blair lifted his head, licked across Jim's leaking cock and looked at the man under him.

"Jim? Do you want this? I haven't done this very often."

"Yes." Jim groaned. "Blair, please. Make love to me." His eyes were closed, one hand reaching down to stroke himself, arching into his own touch.

Blair reached for the robe at the foot of their makeshift bed. He found the small tube of lubricant and condom he'd stashed in a pocket earlier.

"On your side, lover. I want to make this good for you." He crawled up Jim's lean frame, kissed the passion swollen lips, then slid off of Jim's chest. He helped Jim roll on his side, then spooned behind him, one hand twisting the cap off the small tube and squeezing the contents onto his fingers. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to control his own body long enough to prepare his lover properly. He dipped his finger into the crevice between Jim's ass cheeks, letting the older man know he was there and what he was doing, giving him time to pull away. When Jim didn't move, he dipped into the rose pucker and started smoothing the slick gel inside and out, twisting and rubbing, slowing pumping deeper into Jim's body.

Jim pressed back against the intruder, sinking it as deep as possible with a moan. "Blair." He rocked himself on the lone finger several times. "More, baby, please. It's been so long." He whispered several more words that were lost in another moan.

"Easy, lover. I don't want to hurt you." Blair added more gel, then another finger. During his fantasies, passion over rode any pain. But everything he'd studied or experienced with male to male intercourse and knew pain was hard to avoid unless care and patience was taken. So he was taking care, with lots of patience. As his fingers gently stroked Jim, his lips nibbled the back of Jim's neck, sucked an ear, then left a strawberry welt on the pulse point on the join between neck and shoulder. Jim trembled and moaned at every touch.

"I can't take much more of this, Chief. Please, inside me."

"In a moment, babe. Gotta make sure I won't hurt you." Blair added another finger, twisting and turning the three, pumping deeper as Jim rocked against him.

"Please, Blair." The larger man cried out. "Please." He turned his head, straining to reach Blair's lips, kissing him fiercely.

Blair slipped his fingers free, wiped them on a sheet, then scooted his hips closer to Jim, unrolling a condom down his cock, adding more lube to himself. He closed his eyes and tried to steady his breathing. He ached with frustrated desire and his control over his body was almost gone.

"Okay, Jim." He reached around the narrow hips and found Jim's straining penis and pumped twice. On the third stroke he touched his lover with his own, setting himself at Jim's entrance. On the forth stroke Jim arched against him and he was inside without any warning.

Jim rocked against Blair's cock and came all over Blair's hand, voice wailing as the orgasm rolled over him.

Blair froze, trying desperately not to follow Jim over the edge so quickly. But he was surrounded by tight, wet heat which spasmed against him, gripping and releasing him as Jim's orgasm consumed him. It was more than he could handle.

"Jim!" Blair plunged deep and came, adding his own spasms to the ones surrounding him. The sensations left him breathless and dazed.

The two men lay on the floor, almost comatose as they recovered from the climaxes. Finally, Blair pulled free, wincing a little as the super sensitive flesh rubbed against Jim's ass. The condom was taken care of with a tissue and Blair snuggled tight against Jim again.

"You okay, baby?"

Jim stirred, finally rolled over on his back and pulled Blair against him. He nuzzled Blair's face. "Chief, that was incredible." One hand found the sheet and he wiped his chest and stomach before kicking it away. He rolled over on his side, facing his lover. "Felt so good to be touched. You're a wonderful lover." He kissed Blair, tongue touching tongue. He kissed both closed eyes, finally the nose. "You're so good to me. Love you so much."

Blair's eyes popped open. //Love?// But Jim's eyes were closed and his breathing was already deepening to sleep. Jim had one hand wrapped in Blair's, the other tucked under his head and pillow. He was smiling.

Blair snagged the comforter and tucked it around both of them before curling into Jim's chest. He was still thinking about Jim's last statement when sleep claimed him.

Blair rolled over, hand over his eyes as he registered the bright sunlight streaming in the tall windows. After a few minutes he finally sat up, flinching into the brightness, looking around. He was nestled into a pile of blankets and pillows. He smelled coffee and followed his nose. Jim was sitting at the bar, sipping coffee and reading a morning paper. Blair smiled at the picture of a contented Jim, wrapped in the pale blue robe, morning stubble darkening his face. He started working his feet free of the comforter. Jim turned at the noise, then reached for the coffee pot.

"Good morning." Jim knelt with the coffee mug. "You use sugar, right?"

Blair nodded, accepting the mug. "You remember."

The Ranger folded his legs under him and settled on a pillow. "I also remember you were nervous about morning afters. How am I doing?"

The model sipped his coffee, his eyes never leaving Jim's. "I think I like your version of morning afters. Breakfast?"

"I haven't ordered yet. What would you like?"

Blair finished the mug and sat it aside. "You." He reached for Jim, barely giving him time to place the mug on the carpet. He pulled Jim back into the nest of blankets and the patch of sunlight.

"We have a perfectly good bed, Chief." He wrapped Sandburg into his arms, then rolled the smaller man onto his chest. The sunlight haloed the chestnut curls, illuminating the red highlights. Jim stroked the curls, watching them fall, each individual hair catching the light.

"It's warmer here." Blair kissed the larger man. Jim returned the kiss, then added another and another until they were fully involved with each other, thoughts of moving to a bed or breakfast dissolving.

"Did I hurt you last night?" Blair whispered into a convenient ear, then licked it, his tongue following the edge and down into the curves and dips.

Jim stroked the firm back and down the slightly hairy ass cheeks. "No. You were fantastic. I loved every second of it."

"That's what it was too, just seconds." Blair kissed Jim again, taking control of the other man's head and plundering the willing mouth. "Sorry, but I wanted you so badly."

"Want to try again?" Jim whispered into Blair's neck, his fingers tracing the crevice between the younger man's ass cheeks.

Blair lifted his head and met Jim's eyes. "You mean it?"

Jim nodded. One hand slipped between their bodies, touched Blair's arousal, and stroked it gently. Blair arched into the touch, breath hissing through his teeth as the sensation rocketed through him.

"Like that baby?" Jim chuckled as Blair groaned and wiggled against him, trying to thrust into the hand which held him. He changed his gently stroking hand to a firm stroke, catching the first drops of precum and smoothing it over the rose head, using the natural slickness as lubricant. One leg braced Blair's hips as he rolled them both to their sides. He kept up the pumping motion as he kissed his way down Blair's chest, teasing nipples into hardness as he went. He forced Blair onto his back and with one smooth motion, throated the hard cock, his hand rubbing the velvet balls.

"Oh, man. Jim!" Blair tried not to thrust into the wet mouth, tried to hold still so he wouldn't hurt the man that was worshipping him. His hands clinched into the blankets while his body trembled with the effort to stay still.

"Let go, love." Jim whispered, pausing in his love making for a second. "Let me do this for you." He licked the long rod in front of him. "You taste so good." He slurped over the cock head again, teeth brushing lightly over the flared head.

"I won't last, Jim. You don't know what you're doing to me." Blair thrust into the hot mouth.

Jim smiled around the mouthful. He hummed against the silk flesh. Blair lost it and surged upward, erupting down Jim's throat. It was all the Ranger could do to hold onto the surging hips. He relaxed his throat, accepting Blair's offering without resistance.

Blair collapsed into the blankets, panting as the pleasure spiraled downward. He stroked Jim's soft hair, his fingers teasing the short length. "Jim," he whispered. "Lover."

"I like you calling me 'lover'." Jim slithered back up the heaving chest, kissed Blair's mouth, letting the young man taste himself. Blair was limp in his arms, a smile across his lips. The older man settled at the model's side, one finger sliding back and forth over a nipple which peeked out of the mat of hair.

When Blair regained sufficient strength, he turned onto his side, molding himself to his lover. Jim watched him, eyes warm as he met the ones that gazed into his. Blair stroked down Jim's body, felt the unrelieved passion jutting from the nest of curls. He latched onto the ranger's mouth, thrust his tongue deep, stealing the other's breath, while one hand teased the iron erection.

"Make love to me, lover. Take me, possess me." Blair whispered into the open mouth under his. "I want to feel you inside me." He plundered the willing mouth again. "I want you to have what I've never offered anyone else."

Jim heard the words whispered against his lips. He tried to push away from the body clinging to him. He studied the beautiful face. "Blair?" The tone of voice held a thousand questions.

In answer the model found the lube tossed near a pillow sometime in the night, another condom out of his robe and pressed them into the soldier's hand. "I want you. Please." There was no uncertainty in the voice whispering in Jim's ear. The young men spooned his body against Jim's stomach, the firm ass brushing against Jim's cock, teasing it by rubbing up and down, letting the hardness slide the length of the crevice between his cheeks.

Jim moaned at the sensation. He forced his body away from the one tormenting him. "Okay, baby. Just let me get you ready. Relax." He followed words, with action, squeezing the slick gel on his fingers and applying them one at a time to Blair's virgin ass.

Blair groaned at the first penetration, surprised at the feeling and coolness. It took his body a moment to adjust to the intruder which was stroking him so carefully.

Jim froze. "Chief? Okay? Want me to stop?"

Blair shook his head, panting. "No, keep going. I want this, I want you."

Jim smiled, kissed the hair covered neck. "It gets better." He added another finger, moving slowly until the tense body relaxed again, then started rocking against the fingers deep inside. The ranger snuggled tighter to the firm body, and reached around to find Blair's cock slowly returning to life. He stroked it in time with the fingers inside the young man until he was completely hard again. He quickly rolled the thin protective sheath over his own straining erection, returned to his slow, steady stroking of his lover's shaft.

"Blair, sweetheart. Relax now." He kissed an ear, then sucked an earlobe into his mouth, teething on it as he broached the virgin channel. He kept stroking the young man as he entered in a slow push which didn't stop until he was nestled against Blair's ass.

Blair tried not to tense up, breathing hard through his nose, eyes closed, as he pushed back against the intruder. Jim stopped moving, letting his partner adjust to his presence, whispering love words in his ear, nipping his neck and shoulder, leaving passion marks all over the shoulders.

"Okay?" Jim pushed a little, rocking his hips.

Blair nodded, eyes still closed. "I'm okay. Just go slow."

Jim took his time, short, slow strokes while the body melded to his adjusted to him. When the erection in his hand started to regain its original hardness, he increased the stroking pace and angle until he felt the hot spot inside Blair's body.

Blair bucked against him. "Yes, more. Oh, man." The words drifted off to just sounds as their lovemaking continued. "Jim, lover, oh, harder, oh, baby."

The ranger listened to his lover and complied, feeling Blair rock back to meet him with each stroke. The erection he held pulsed in his hand and he changed his grip, wanting to prolong his lover's release as long as possible.

Blair panted into the pillows. He was on fire from the inside. He wanted to come but not yet. He wanted Jim to come inside of him, and he wanted their joining to last forever. The sensations zinging through his nerves were more than he'd ever hoped for. Jim was inside him! It was better than any fantasy! The hand on his cock sped up and he knew he wasn't far from falling over the edge into ecstasy.

"Jim, oh, can't hold it. Gonna...oh." The last was a whimper into the pillow as he came for the second time that morning. He felt the cock inside him jerk as the ranger came with a loud cry.

Hours passed before Blair opened his eyes again. His lover was still spooned against him, snoring softly into his hair. The comforter was tucked around him and a pillow was under his head. He lifted his head and looked through the open drapes. The sun had moved around to where it no longer cast its warming rays into the room. Blair mentally calculated the morning to be half over. Jim shifted behind him, rolling over on his back, one arm still touching the younger man. He didn't wake.

Blair worked his way out of the nest of blankets, pulling himself up with the bed, then the dresser. He was surprised at the pain he felt as he stumbled to the bathroom. He turned the water on in the shower and leaned against the cold ceramic as the warmth cascaded over his shoulders. The water stung every tooth mark on his neck and shoulders. The sting made Blair grin. The memories of the night before were more than he'd hoped for. His hands started checking himself for injury in areas which had never been touched before in such a manner.

The glass door opened and the large body of his lover stepped inside. "Good morning again, lover. Are you all right?" Jim put his strong arms around Blair's slender body and pulled it against his chest, bent his head for a kiss. Blair melted into the kiss, ignoring the water running into his face. Hands were on his ass, gently kneading up and down.

"I'm fine." Blair broke the kiss, dropped his forehead to Jim's chest, feeling the hot water flow around the hands holding him. He ran a hand over the smooth chest, tweaked a nipple, then sucked it, teeth biting on the hard flesh. Jim groaned under the sensual assault.

"Sure I didn't hurt you?" Jim's hand slid between Blair's ass cheeks, one finger touching the tightly closed rose pucker. "First times can be painful."

"I'm a little sore, but not bad." Blair shifted away from the touch, an indrawn breath the only indication of discomfort. "You?"

Jim kissed his new lover. "You were very considerate. It'd been so long that it was almost like my first time. This first time was much better." He reached for the shampoo and began washing the long locks. Jim's hands kneaded the scalp under the fingertips, eyes closed as he enjoyed the feeling of soap and long hair. Blair hummed in pleasure.

"What do we do next?" Jim turned Blair so he could rinse the long hair. He tipped the smaller head under the water and carded his fingers through it, watching the soap rinse away.

"Immediate plans, or long term?" Blair kept his eyes closed, smiling as Jim rinsed his hair.

"Neither. Both. I haven't planned longer than a day for a long time. The future was always too uncertain." He pulled Blair from the water, took liquid soap and started on the hairy chest.

"Immediate, breakfast. Long term, we can talk about it. What do you want to do?"

"Breakfast sounds good." Jim kissed the plush mouth, then stepped into the hot water.

Blair watched Jim finish his coffee. The ranger was in jeans and tee shirt, barefeet rubbing over his shins, blue eyes watching him. Blair finished his orange juice, tossed his napkin on the table. "They serve a nice brunch."

"Especially since I didn't have to kill it, clean it or pick it."

Blair snorted in laughter. The two men stacked their dishes on a tray and placed it outside the room door. Jim wandered behind the bar, took two tumblers and split the tiny cognac between the glasses. He carried the two glasses over to the couch where Blair sat and handed one to his partner.

He sank down into the cushions next to his lover. They clinked their glasses together, took a sip of the strong liquor.

Blair took the callused hand in his. "What now, love? Have you made any life alternating decisions lately?"

Jim caressed the fingers nestled in his palm. "I don't think I can go back to the Army, Chief. To much has happened. Peru, the crash, meeting you. It'd be almost impossible to have a male lover and stay in the military."

"If you quit the Army, what will you do?"

Jim shook his head. "I haven't thought that far ahead. Something that can use the training I have. Something that I can do and still be with you when your schedule will allow it."

Blair nodded, knocked back his drink. He settled his cognac flavored lips on Jim's, kissed the older man thoroughly. "I like the idea of us being together."

"I love the idea, Blair Sandburg." Jim put his free hand in the damp curls, held Blair close. "I want to spend more than one night with you. I want to get to know you, all sides of you." He kissed the lush mouth, tongue deep in Blair's mouth, playing with the tongue he found there. "The thing that scares me the most right now is whether you'll let me or not."

Blair panted against Jim's neck, trying to regain his breath after Jim stole it. "I think I'd like that allot Jim. Just promise you'll let the reverse happen as well."

The ranger wrapped both arms around the model. Blair settled into the strong arms with a sigh and didn't move. He felt like he'd come home for the first time in his life.

Comments welcomed at [email protected]

End Lonely Hearts Club #2.

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